Chupacabra has been captured in Claremore Oklahoma, where where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain and blood sucking cryptids run rampant. Chupacabra's are like bunnies in Claremore Oklahoma.
Now the know-it-all "news media" are saying that this beast is a raccoon with a severe case of the mange. Horse apples. That thing is the damn goat sucker. It's painfully obvious.
Adam and I are seriously considering hopping separate jets to head to Oklahoma for a fact-finding mission. Bringing yet another eerie coincidence of how much we are like Sean Penn. Along with punching random people in the streets.
That thing is Chupacabra. As Lord Hanuman as my witness, that's the blood thirsty Chupacabra.
We'll bring our expertise, establish a verdict and report back. But we already know the answer...