For years and years Miroslav Šatan has scored goals for various NHL teams.
But he has never done so for the team he was born to play for: the New Jersey Devils.
While I'm not a Devils fan, I have openly wished that Satan would one day wear a Devils jersey.
Think of the fabulous PR it would generate.
The memorabilia and jersey sales.
The fervor religious groups could mistakenly be sucked into.
The potential for incredible newspaper headlines....
"Satan scores big for Devils"
"Satan's goal buries Rangers"
"Devils fans hail Satan"
Well now is the perfect time for my dream to become reality.
Satan is an unrestricted free agent.
Right now he's working out with my favorite cellar dwellers, The NY Islanders, in hopes of getting a contract. While Satan waits for the Islanders , it's the team a few miles away who need to pounce.GM Lou Lamoriiello pick up the phone or, for God sake, just tweet Satan's agent.
You can get your man cheap.
In Satan, the Devils have the perfect fit. A goal scorer with the perfect name. (I don't care if that's not how it's really pronounced.)
So what do you say Lou? It's high time the Devils got themselves Satan.