In the YesButNoButYes forums, Dave laid out the concept of "I Woulds". These are the people you would jump in bed with given a chance, even if you are in a committed relationship. Of course, the chances of this happening are extremely slim in most cases, so it's a theoretical exercise. "Fantasy" would be a better word.
So in the internet equivalent of the game Truth or Dare, I'll go ahead and list the "I Woulds" in my life. Easy for me to do, since I am not in a committed relationship. I'm not even in an uncommitted relationship! And I challenge others to do the same. Specifically, YBNBY authors who would not be kicked to the curb over such a post. Anyone else is invited to list yours in the comments.
OK, before you react to my list with "Eww", I want you to remember that I am the oldest contradictor. Guys young enough to be my son are nice to look at, but that's about all. I am also inserting a caveat that I would only take advantage of these theoretical opportunities if the involved parties were not married (most of them are), because I don't mess with married men. If I did, I wouldn't be leading the comically lonely lifestyle I do.
Jon Stewart
What's not to love? He has the wit and timing I wish I had, wrapped up in sexy maleness. W00t!
Harrison Ford
You can joke about Indiana Jones and the Social Security Check all you want, but I still look at him and see Han Solo.
Barack Obama
There's nothing in the world sexier than an intelligent man who cares about people. That's in addition to being easy on the eyes. Oh, and he's about the become president.
Johnny Depp
OK, this one's a given.
Rubén Blades
You can go ahead and include the entire cast of Once Upon a Time in Mexico, with the exception of Cheech Marin and Willem DaFoe.
Robert Plant
The soundtrack of my youth, and the poster I woke up to every morning.
Sean Connery
I am well aware that he's a male chauvinist, but we're not talking about a long-term relationship, are we? However, Mel Gibson was dropped from my list a few years ago for bigotry.
What was that forum question about anyway? Oh yeah, SO wanted to know what you'd like to see YBNBY publish now that the election is over. I guess I took the bait on that one, huh Dave?
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Great topic...
Just have to warn you, I'm kind of an imaginary "I would" whore...imaginary because I don't actually want to meet half of them, let alone hook up, because the illusion is half the fun...(and yes, most of them are married--I agree with her rule on that one)
That being said, I would fight Miss C for Jon Stewart, because I've been in his audience and he's even funnier when he's not scripted and is riffing with the crowd....
--Adam Sandler (I have a thing for funny Jewish guys from the tri-state area)
--Kevin James (funny is sexy)
--Ben Affleck
--Matt Damon (Boston accents...mmm...)
--Jake from Sixteen Candles
--the blond surfer from Private Practice
--the Preferred Stock twins (from way back in the 80s--but them then, not now since I haven't seen any recent pics)
--Paul Rudd
--John Cusack
--Brad Pitt
--George Clooney
there are more...but I've already established my whorehood....so I'll leave a few for the other ladies...
Oh man, how could I forget George Clooney!?!@ I even use him as a default partner when I need one for my site. Fellow Kentucky native, ya know...
We get to go retro, too? I mean, if you can pull Jake from Sixteen Candles and the 80's version of the Preferred Stock twins, I can pull Cheryl Ladd from 1978 right?
Just to clarify ...
Angelina Jolie...Like johnny depp for the ladies. that's a given.
Tina Fey...Smart and funny is sexy
Elle MacPherson... The poster I woke up to every morning
Amy Lee (from Evanescence)...ice blue eyes and long dark hair is a winner every time.
The [ahem] wheel knows no time limits....
SP--not a Johnny fan...I was a Richard Grieco girl....
My Wife tells me if Vin Diesel or John Cena (pro-wrestler if ya don't know) came along, she'd deny my existence.
Miss C-
Great Topic.
I was almost offended that I didn't make your list of "I Would's", until I realised you left Clooney off, at any rate I forgive you.
I had a friend who told me his wife knew that if he ever had a shot at Natalie Portman he would go for it in 2 seconds. Not sure how often he reminded her of that.
SP - I didn't expect to see Amy Lee on anyone's list. She definitely has something about her ... plus you know she's smart and could hold a pretty deep conversation. Still, I don't think she'll make my list ... now that I can go retro.
Am I the only one who would have to have Elisabeth Hurley on the list?
Dave, I'll add Elizabeth from the mid-90's. She's beautiful. I think I'll hold the conversation to a minimum, though. Snobby is a big turnoff.
Tim, I think she's shy, not snobby...and anyone who would wear a dress pulled together by safety pins (Versace) has to have a certain adventurous side to her...if you know what I mean...
(British accent just adds to the snobby perception)
Ladies, if 'I would' doesn't work out. Perhaps this would...
https://www.flossie.com/man-vending-machine/
oh, def.
-milla donovan
-juliette binoche
-thorn from Bone
-zooey descanel
-marisa tomei
-maggie gyllenhaal
-marianne faithfull (40 years ago)
-maria taylor
-tina fey
-carla gugino
not " i would"s more like, "i would take you to dinner"s
either way, these are some odd choices for a 19 year old.
I thinking the Elisabeth Hurley in Bedazzled.
Tim, Snobbiness dissapears the minute "I would" transforms into "I Am".
(General Rule.)
Baier...Mr Perfect gets the assist when it comes to the I would wheel.....
Tim, Dave's right...if you're doing it right, it's hard for her to be snobby and applaud your efforts at the same time...
My life has been all theory, no practice.
Since, I am still a virgin.
hahahahahahahahahaha.....
Dave, you forgot about our meeting at LSU....that counts :-)
I was only 10 years old.
Everybody know Virginity doesn't count until after the age of 12.
alrighty then....
you tell your future daughter that when she reaches age 11...
besides, you can still play "I Would" if you still have your cherry...it's not "I have", after all....
And....I have news for you...that 2 year old son you were driving around the ranch with the other day...well, he might not be yours...
I'm pretty sure that if I weren't a virgin, that my "I have" list would be more impressive than my "I woulds".
Thats just the way I roll, theorhetically.
I'm pretty sure that you can't refer to a dudes virginity as still having his "cherry".
I could have made up the "2 year old son" story because you wanted a chick answer.
Which means you could be assuming the identity of a guy for our sake as well....hence the cherry remark is standing....
And it just sounds better than what, "spewing his wad into a gracious host"?
That goes back to the question, what if I am just some made up entity by the staff of YBNBY?
Didn't someone make that accusation once when I was on a trip?
EVERY time you go on a trip...
but I think you're real...
creating you would be a full time job...and this crew is too busy for that!
OK, my list includes:
Salma Hayek
Kelly Preston
Cheryl Ladd
Halle Berry
Sara Evans
Shania Twain
The following would definitely weaken my defenses, but I think I could hold it together:
Jane Seymour
Phoebe Cates
Jordana Brewster
Jami Gertz
Elizabeth Hurley
Miranda Lambert
Tiffani-Amber Thiessen
P.S. If I ever disappear for more than a month or so, my wife has stumbled across this site. At some point in the interrogation, I probably denied knowing any of you. You will find your letters of apology in a secret safe-deposit box at the Bank of Fort Knox under the name of 'Monkey Boy'.
Tim, it's an "I Would" list....not an "I did"...
and I would much rather that my man had a list of celebs than a list of coworkers that he "would"...
but I understand the denials....it's okay, most of us only exist in Scara's imagination anyway....
I'm pretty sure I'm real.
How come none of the ladies have mentioned Dr. McDreamy?
Every time I change in front of the mirror, I know that I am very real.
... and we know Dave is real because of the photographic proof provided by Baierman in the 'Ouch, that Hurts' submission from Friday.
(I'll wait for it.)
Tim, nice work referencing your own comments about Principal Nice...
McDreamy...well, he's almost cliche...I'd take Dempsey from the 'Can't buy me love' years...a little more geeky, yes--but possibly more humble as well....
Charlize Theron
Elisabeth Hurley
Debra Messing
Dave
Sandra Bullock
Geena Davis (late 80's early 90's)
Carrie-Anne Moss
Asia Argento
Jonnie - You must be a tall dude.
Nope, just 5' 6". I did have a great time Norway, 6' chicks with 3" platform shoes!
Height doesn't matter when you're horizontal anyway...
Tim. (It's coming.)
Johnnywalker-Thanks buddy. I needed that.
Sarcky - "Height doesn't matter when you're horizontal anyway"
You're so old school.
Hm, I am not a Depp, Clooney, or McDreamy fan, but I will take Jake Gyllenhaal and a mid 80's Michael Biehn.
I don't mind using a step stool, ladder, trapeze ...
... countertop, desktop, showerwall ....
Muffler, Doorknob, Razor Blade, Bag Pipes, Speaker Magnet.....
Airplane Glue, Tater tots, Mechanical pencil....
Sorry Tim...didn't realize this was a "where would you do your 'I would' list" list...
just because you're horizontal doesn't mean you're in bed missionary style...
you forgot all bodies of water (pool, ocean, hot tub, bathtub, garden tub, jacuzzi tub, lake, stream, creek, river, waterfall)
other surfaces (pool table; beach; mountainside; meadow; cornfield; front porch; chairs--wheeled, recliner, kitchen;)
countertop is too broad...try kitchen counter, bathroom counter, dressing room counter, airplane bathroom counter (okay, tight, but possible)
johnnie--were you including sex swing in trapeze category? and if so, there's ceiling bolted and free standing....
I know I missed some....
Firewood, roof shingles, Fish hooks...
Dave, were those your I would or I Have list?
I don't even know what the hell we are talking about.
I only read half the comments.
(Myrtle.)
Miss Celania:
As a heterosexual male, I find your list quite informative. I teach Psychology to college freshmen, and I do an exercise where I compare 2 women and ask the guys which they would choose, and I compare 2 men. I try to highlight the attraction women have for older, more secure men, and the attraction men have for younger, more nubile women.
Unfortunately, I have very little understanding as to what a woman actually finds attractive in a man. Case in point: I tried to see if 18 and 19 year old girls found Sean Connery sexy, but apparently he was too old for them. Now I'm using George Clooney as the older, but attractive guy, and it works like gangbusters. I love to see them cringe when I tell them he's old enough to be their grandfather.
Incidentally, the women I ask them to compare are Jessica Alba and Madeline Albright. They have no idea who Madeline Albright is, so I need a powerful, older woman to replace her. Any thoughts?
kbk-Sharon Ozbourne.
and yes. I would.
kbk, George was born in 1961.
So, yes, theoretically he could be their grandfather---but at age 47, that's some young parents (an 18 yr old would have to be born to a 20 year old father who was born to a 19 year old father...happens around these parts, but is not the national average...)
Hell, I'm 35 so I could be a grandma by now by NC standards...but I'm not.
They have no idea who Albright is because a freshman was born in 1990. Yes folks, that is correct and scary as hell.
kbk ponders in teaching psychology: " They have no idea who Madeline Albright is, so I need a powerful, older woman to replace her."
...How about Hillary Clinton, Micheal Obama, Katie Couric, or Oprah Winfrey?
reminds me of an old friend who when pledging a frat was asked if he would choose Maryann or Ginger...and he said Mrs Howell because she had the money...
Thanks SO, It is so nice to feel OLD at the end of my day!
Welcome to how I've felt sitting in classrooms for the past 3+ years...
it's bad when the prof is younger than you (it's happened more than once)
my top 5..
Clea DuVall (Girl Interrupted, But I'm A Cheerleader)
Kate Moennig (The L Word)
Lee Pace (Pushing Daisies, The Fall)
Robert Smith (The Cure)
James Spader (Boston Legal, Secretary) - i adore his annunciation
~Teresa
Sarky don't feel bad. You are still 3 years younger than my Mom.
Your not that old.
Dave, we love you.
And I know you don't hear those words from your mom, so you have to pick on us...but we do love you...
(besides, after all the people I've lost in my life over the years, being old doesn't really bother me)
and according to my calculations, your mom was 7 when she had you...
guess she was a virgin and you were an immaculate conception, huh?
:-)
(yes, I read most of the posts and forums...)
You know I'm just joking. You're only a few years older than me.
Now,Tim on the otherhand, has daughters older than the both of us.
I only pick on those I love.
Awww....Dave....
that's why we miss you when you're gone--we're left to pick on ourselves...and we're much meaner than you, because we have all the dirt on ourselves....
Hey, I was sleeping!!! (I really was.)
Dave, you're right, but you're wrong, but you're right. My oldest is 11 now. She is already taller than my wife, who is not short (5' 6"). If I don't stop feeding her (my daughter, that is), she may be taller than me in a few years. When she gets ready to go to church, or a wedding or whatever event requires her to 'doll up', she could easily pass for 16. I can't imagine what I will be hit with in a few years.
Jonnie et al. I'm 45 and I have a 3 year old. Chasing her around all day doesn't make me feel old, it tells me that I am old. Words I can deal with; reality sucks.
P.S. Dave, thanks for referencing the Myrtle comment. I was beginning to wonder if anyone saw it. She really bent me.
Tim-You should email me a photo of your oldest daughter....
JUST KIDDING!
You had that coming from earlier.
Myrtle. PFFT!
I'm with you on Jon Stewart, Miss C. I would also take Colbert!
My ultimate 'I would' has to be Clive Owen! In "Elizabeth: The Golden Age".....I was melting every time he came on screen. And I think it's because of his voice. I originally enjoyed him in "Closer" and "Sin City" but in Elizabeth, MAN! Is it hot in here??!?!
Some other dudes on my list include (spelling errors and all), Ryan Reynolds, Wilmer Valderama, Beckham, and the dude who plays Warrick on CSI.
Also, I would also totally go for Scarlett Johannsen
Oh, come on now, George Clooney is only 47. To be the grandfather of a college student, each generation would have to give birth at about 15. It's a stretch. Most college students would have fathers around that age. You're making me feel really old. SO, your calculations would work for a man 57 years old.
If you use Jessica Alba and Madeline Albright on the women's side, which slot does Clooney fit into? The powerful ugly old one, or the hot young one? I respect Madeline Albright, but you have to admit she was never a sex symbol. Doesn't seem like your male and female comparisons add up. For an older powerful woman, I thought of Hillary Clinton, Condoleeza Rice, and Oprah Winfrey. I see BB thinks like me.
Oops.....
did I mention I'm better w/words than numbers?
and Madeline Albright would have to be paired up with a Sumner Redstone/Warren Buffett/Rupert Murdoch type of guy for a fair comparison....
Clooney has gotten better w/age...look at Facts of Life or the original ER as proof (the comedy)
ooh....just remembered I need to add Matt Lauer to my list...
What about asking the college guys about Dr. Ruth or Sue Johanson?
prob too young to know either....
I guess since we are on an old kick, add Regis to my list.
Dave...somehow I see you watching him, trying to play it off as a crush on Kelly....
to each their own....
I'm not on an old kick. I am just old.
Dave,
I will send a picture of my daughter. It will arrive in about 15 years. I'll schedule the ceremony. I will be proud to have you as my son-in-law.
Dad
Miss C, I think Dave's remark was a snide comeback to my comment about Mr. Lauer...plus my talking about the AARP sex experts....
Aren't the older ladies we propose supposed to be at least somewhat sexy? Oprah? Hillary? Why not add Barbara Bush? or John Madden?
Assuming that you are looking for intelligent, articulate, well-known ladies over 50, how about Jane Fonda, Jaclyn Smith or Cheryl Ladd?
Matt Lauer?!?!? Keep talking, ladies. You're making me feel better every minute.
Ask an 18 yr old boy who Cheryl Ladd is....
I know who she is, but what was the last thing she appeared in (that didn't involve some tissues and lotion and a guy who was 'napping')?
Mmmmm........fantasy is soooo much fun. I'm not going to worry about the sexual orientation of the people on my list, as that spoils my fantasy, and it is, after all, as a woman, my right to change my mind and switch things up anytime I choose......
Brad Pitt
Johnny Depp
Angelina Jolie
Hugh Jackman
Natalie Portman
Keanu Reeves
Pink
Dave Grohl
Mike Rowe (yes, the guy from Dirty Jobs)
That'll do for now...
oooh...I forgot about Mike Rowe...it's safe to say that that man would be up for anything.....
Oh, Sarcky. I really was napping. There are three chil'n in the house for goodness sakes.
I'll take it out on the wife later this evening.
Besides, Cheryl's on TV all the time. But on those women's network 'I was wronged' movies, or an occasional 'I slept with my best friend's husband' dramas.
If you're right about 18-year-old boys, then 1) we need to have a campaign that requires they spend 5 hours per week watching TV Land (Charlies Angels reruns, etc ...) to gain appreciation for the older ladies, and 2) we need to review your activities to see how you know so much about 18-year-old boys.
Did you used to be a high school teacher?
I'm a college student...and am not the least bit attracted to 18 yr old boys...because they are just that--boys....
they might have enough stamina to get through the obstacle course twice, but they haven't figured out all the ins and outs yet....
give me someone in his 30s who knows the ropes....
How about someone in his 40s that knows the ropes and the chains?
Tim, btw...last time I checked, Lifetime's key demographic was not the 18-25 category....
All I'm gonna say is that I'm quite happy with my boyfriend's knowledge...and he's not younger than me...
Miss Celania: True, he's not likely to be their grandfather. I thought he was 50 already? Anyways, its still possible!
I think I have used Hilary before, I may stick with her again. Not sure why I went back to Madeline Albright. I think I initially used her because there's a Family Guy gag where the guys are asking who they would do, and one of them says her.
Its hard to compare across sexes in that way though. Young men aren't as big on aging sex symbols as young women are.
True, but guys don't care about those things. We just keep flipping through the remote until we see either 1) serious mass-destruction, or 2) a great looking babe to watch for a while.
There's plenty of 18-25 year old guys unknowingly watching Lifetime ... ten minutes at a time.
Older, powerful women... well my suggestions were more well known than Madeleine Albright... but not hot enough, eh.
Well, how about the most powerful woman of all: Nina Hagen!
(raise your hand if you are too young to know who she is)
Nina Hagen? Isn't she Europunk from a long time ago?
hand raised...but thanks to wikipedia, I now know!
I gotta look it up ...
Dude, that's nasty.
Vicky beat me to Scarlett Johannsen, so I'll take Uma Thurman instead if no-one wants her, circa Kill Bill.
Dave, I am with you on one thing at last - I used to have the Bedazzled poster hanging in my office.
Scaramouch - There are no rules that I am aware of that say you're not allowed to wrestle her away.
Or, perhaps your very presence will force them to fight over you.
Man, sign me up for Liz Hurley too. Looks great and I think that accent is hot (on her, even though it sounds kind of phony and all). Any woman they get to play Satan is probably ahead of the game.
As they say, I would walk 20 miles through a blizzard to lick the tread of the tires of the truck that took her skivvies to the Dump. The fact that Hugh Grant hooks up with the first hooker he sees in LA when he's not with her is proof that monogamy is straight up delusional. QED.
(Liz, girl, holla, you won't regret it.)
E
Guys, you need to look up Keeley Hazell. Nothing hotter than large, and natural boobs.
I second angelina jolie, elizibeth hurly, uma, and jessica alba.
Wait a minute. Hold everything. Liz Hurley reads the commentary here? I gotta change my list.
Put Liz on top.
I had to look up Mike Rowe, Richard Grieco, and Dr. McDreamy. I apparently miss a lot by not watching TV!
kbk - No doubt, she's incredible. Has she done anything but modeling, Page 3 type stuff?
In no order (but ladies, please form one line):
Elizabeth Banks, Mia Kirshner, Willow from Buffy, Halle Berry, Zooey Deschanel, Nancy Drew (aka Pamela Sue Martin), Meadow Soprano, Katie Holmes before she started hanging out with Tom Cruise, Jena Malone, and, what the hell, if I have a few minutes, Natalie Portman.
Miss C...well, Richard G hasn't had a career since about 1987, so I'm surprised he even had internet presence...
and Mike Rowe is present in households where a male won't let go of the remote, so you are blessed on that count (I just decided to have crushes on the guys who host or do voiceovers on every show on the history and discovery channels and the tv miraculously gets shut off quicker...)
McDreamy you would have known if we had referred to him as Patrick Dempsey due to his career longevity (or comeback?)
Ohhh, Meadow! Forgot about her. Nice job.
Am I the only one surprised by the fact that the brunette woulds tend to outnumber the blonds (at least according to my calculations, but we've seen above how great my math skills are at times)?
I notice no one mentioned Paris Hilton. Good taste yall. BTW, Tim, I think Jamie Gertz is getting hotter every time I see her. She's cooler somehow.... Also, Kelly Presoton in Mischief - good flick, excellent women. Dmn. AOC, Phoebe Cates. If I had the only vote in the country she'd be President. Oh well.
SO, I think you're correct. Beats me though. Nothing against any hair color or anything, you just gotta get the whole package...
Let me throw in Scully to balance the paradigm for a red-headed perspective. (Though I did mention Willow..)
Mmmmmm, Mike Rowe for sure! I would even take seconds on that one, Sarcky!
And Scaramouch, I think you should definitely have Scarlett. But I'd at least like to watch!
Wait....Tim....am I fighting ScarJo for Mouch? Oh! I am SO up for that! Who's got Jello?
and that, boys and girls, is why Vicky is worthy of her icon...
Vicky, you are so fun....have you and Dave tousled* at all? If so, I missed it, so someone either direct me to the post, or I'll look forward to a future episode...
*by tousled I don't mean going at in any of the many locations I mentioned above, but plain ol' verbal banter...
on the other hand, watching Dave with Wonder Woman might be fun...something tells me he might like the lasso...
E - I used to melt every time I saw Jami Gertz on screen. She still looks great, but never better than in Less Than Zero. I always thought she was a NY gal, but then I found out that she was born in Chicago a few years after me. Obviously, we're soul mates.
Kelly Preston in Mischief is film gold. That bedroom scene needs to be enshrined. I know it is in my mind.
Phoebe Cates. Well, she's Phoebe Cates. American males have only leased her to Kevin Kline.
Yes, you two ladies make for a very entertaining team.
Oh Sarcky! You always make me feel warm and fuzzy inside!
Tim-I'm with you on Jami Gertz. Good one dude
Hmm....I don't remember the Davester and I have done any tousling. But I mighta been drunk that night...wait does tousling involve noodles? or whipped cream?
Vicky - It's best with both.
Sarcky - I've been over and over the math for this whole George Clooney thing and I can't see where you are wrong.
If I have a kid at 18, and my kid has a kid at 18, that makes me a Grandpa at 36. If my grandchild has a kid at 18, I am a great-Grandpa at 54.
How are you wrong?
Woah, noodles AND whipped cream? That's an awesome, slimy, sticky sweet mess. I love it already. Put me down for "yes"
Tim, the original question was how George Clooney could be a grandpa to a college student. He is only 47.
Oh, to a college student ... gotcha.
So, in summary: Sarcky fails math, Tim fails reading.
Tim, Clooney is only 47....so therefore I made him 57 when I mis-added 20 + 18+ 19....
he could be the grandpa of an 8 year old, but not an 18 yr old college student. Unless, like Miss C said, each one was 15 or 16 at the time of the next generation's births...
lucky for me there are more words than numbers in law....
The women of Mad Men, in particular the red headed secretary and the blonde wife of the main dude. (Don't watch the show enough to be more thoughtful than dat.)
Oh shit! You're going to be a lawyer? Hmm, we might need one of those around here.
Miss C....I will be if they allow me to enter law school, hand over obscene amounts of money for an education, then succeed in passing the bar...(this past stint at school has been to get my bachelor's degree)
and don't worry...I can figure out settlement numbers...as long as they're not based on age :-)
Evil Willow from Buffy! mmmmm!
Sarcky - make sure your secretary / legal assistant does all of the billing or you will be doing involuntary probono work.
On a side note, when you get in to law school try and find the computer apps that work with evil microsoft. It gets real old converting docs from Corel to send out.
This is too easy:
Amy Winehouse
Dame Judi Dench
Cloris Leachman
The bones of Sylvia Plath
A jar of peanut butter
Skeletor
Tony Kornheiser
Larry Flynt
Oh wait. I thought it was a game of "I probably wouldn't."
Nope. No give-backs DSB. That's your list buddy. Enjoy.
P.S. Cloris Leachman was pretty damn sweet when she was young.
Playing catchup- Vicki you would remember me even if you were drunk and pumped full of Rufinol.
Scaramouch or anyone for that matter, I would take the fight for Hurley.
Add Paris Hilton to my list.
After DSB's list she looks good.
DSB-I'm with Tim no give-backs. Have fun with your Crackwhore Amy winehouse.
I'll back off Hurley for the good of mankind. But Salma Hayek is all mine.
Since we are taking claim I would also like to take claim on Jessica Alba.
How did she get overlooked??
I'm pretty sure someone mentioned her already. Let's assume that it was Vicky.
Tim-I kind of have a feeling that you and S.O. would like to see Vicki and I get into it.
No, I just think that it is very important that we encourage the whole girl-on-girl theme. You know, variety. (Plus, I have to get Baier's last post outta my head. That was not the variety I was looking for.)
I wasn't promoting a fight between you and Vicki. I prefer unforced entertainment ... and so, I'm hoping the return of Myrtle.
Oh well. At least I got Skeletor.
That's good, DSB, 'cause I got a thing for peanut butter.
Tim- I think I should have mentioned Jessica Alba. And Jennifer Connelly circa Career Opportunities. Yeah!
And Dave- I'm a lover, not a fighter. So....no worries about us getting into it. I say, make love, not war. If you intend on getting me drunk and slipping me some rufies, then make sure you bring candles, feathers and handcuffs, and honey, k?
P.S. I crack up every time I open this one and see Spongebob giving the thumbs up sayin "I'd hit it". Classic.
Vicky - I had a tough time not including Jennifer in my list. I was starting to get greedy, so I left her off.
She was prime in The Hot Spot as well.
Oh, indeed she was Tim. I forgot about that one! I suppose I blocked it from memory due to the fact that it included Don Johnson
Anne Hathaway and Sandra Bullock on the same day....and, "I would."
Joining a little late but let's go:
- Liz Hurley, who made me wish to go to hell
- Anne Hathaway
- Satomi Yoshida (I have a crush on Japanese girls, in fact, my wife is a descendant)
- Bettie Page
- Rita Hayworth (for both these two I'd need a time machine)
- Penelope Cruz
- Maria Bello
- Bridget Moynahan
That's it for a starting list.
I think I'm adding Shia Labeouf to my list. He's only 22, but he's darn cute. I enjoy his scruffy look in Eagle Eye....
Vicky...I'll let you have him...when I see Shia I think Even Stevens...just like when I see DiCaprio I think Growing Pains...
Makes me feel like the dirty babysitter...and not in a good way...
So, none of you guys mentioned Demi Moore...that surprises me...she's got the kind of voice that makes you want to have phone sex with her...(I know she's good looking, but I've known average looking people whose voices made them sexier)
Demi Moore does nothing for me.
She did when I was younger but now shes about neck and neck with Kathy Lee Gifford.
She wouldn't make my I would list.
I don't know but I think I'm one of those guys that voice doesn't matter. I do appreciate a nice singing voice in a woman but I don't think a sexy voice would make an average woman sexier for me.
I guess Demi's voice doesn't do any thing for me.
So, Dave, are you saying no to both Gifford and Moore, or yes to their necks?
Sarcky I am SOOO with you on that. A voice totally makes the man for me. And a British/English (don't know which is the correct one to use) accent is my all time wet-maker. Wooo! Ok, now it's hot in here.
I know what you mean about feeling like the dirty babysitter too. But because I'm less than 10 years older than he, I allowed Shia into my perverted brain.
Demi Moore does nothing to me too. Maybe back then when she was talking to Swayze's ghost, but now she looks like a guy who had a gender switching surgery...
But Sharon Stone has an appeal, though she's not too beautiful, I think she has a fire burning inside...
Leo, that's a great description of Demi Moore she does look like a guy that has had a sex change.
Now Sharon Stone has had her hot days. I wonder if that burning fire within is just a case of the clap??
I hope it's not Dave... Surely hope it's not.
I could see (at least for the half comments I've read [by Myrtle]) that no one has picked the Olsen twins. Not that I'm claiming them, no way... but as Paris Hilton, looks like they've been ignored...
Demi Moore....Nothing
Olsen Twins... Nothinger
I'd say that they are "twice nothing", but it's the same...
Jessica Beil???
Not bad.
Yeah... not bad... not a marvel too...
What about Melanie Nunes Fronckowiak, the Brazilian girl who won the sloggi "world's most beautiful ass" contest in France?
https://tinyurl.com/5eekge
I'll have to agree with you ladies that the voice adds a lot. I was on radio forever and wondered how the ugliest and most unpleasant disc jockeys could get laid by fans so often.
But recently I met a man who looks like the average guy on the street, but when he calls I get all tingly. His voice is deep and well-modulated, and he has no Kentucky accent! It makes him look so much better.
Thanks Miss C. I'll call more often.
I think we both know that I am more than just some average guy off the street though.
I agree that the voice may add.
For an "I would", what must be--if happens--a one night stand, it might influence less, but for a long term, hell yeah... not only the voice, but also the accent can blow away all the heat from a relation.
There are some Brazilian accents that I hate so much that I wouldn't even take the girl for a one night date, let alone a commitment.
I'd never have a date, for example, with that The Nanny actress--don't know her name--even if she was the hottest woman in the world, and maybe even if she was the last one.
Leo, you mean Fran Drescher....
you could sleep with her if she was the last woman on Earth....you just get more adventurous with items that won't allow her to speak, if you know what I mean...(and no, not duct tape)
I'm with Leo. I still couldn't do it.
what if both of your arms were injured and you couldn't scratch the itch?
I'd find my way somehow... I could lie in my bed, belly down, and start rubbing myself on the mattress. But Fran Drescher...
No way, Jose...
sounds like someone has been there, done that....but done her...
(but NOT done her)
You might be desperate if you do her...
The same for Paris Hilton, Britney, Amy Winehouse...
But I have to say... I envy Javier Bardem. He's on a love triangle with Scarlett Johansson and Penelope Cruz (on Vicky Cristina Barcelona). I'm going to make a call... Why in the hell didn't Woody Allen pick me? Oh Jeebus.
Oh yes! I agree Leo. That would be a good threesome
1) Kate Winslet - simply perfect.
2) Iris Dement - A beautiful voice that can whisper sweet nothings in my ear any day.
3) Sarah Palin - The world's most attractive politician.
Yeah... I'll watch this movie, knowing that there will be no threesome, but thanks to you Vicky, I have the image in my brain...
I'd like to add Catherine Zeta Jones to my list.
Leo - Did you know that she's a major smoker? She's beautiful, but the smoking thing kept her off my list. I had a girlfriend that smoked when I was younger. Very unpleasant to make out with her.
If you're a smoker, though, that's a major score. Being a smoker (or not caring if your lady smokes) opens up a whole other group of babes.
I had a girlfriend whose kisses tasted like licking an ashtray... although I used to smoke--and quit--I don't like the ashtray taste.
Think I'll skip her.
If the girl smokes in a reasonable way, of course you can try to bear, but a chimney-mouth is a huge deal.
My number one would be Adam Weishaupt. Who'd have thought the founder of the Illuminati would be such an f'ing sex pot? Just got thru reading "Rite of the Revolution." Anybody else read it?
Nice. When you've used him up you can move on ... to a young Thomas Jefferson, perhaps?
Jefferson is not exactly what I would consider one of the Hot Guys of the Revolution, not that I wouldn't go there, but he would have to do a whole lot of oration first.
FYI, Hot Guys of the Revolution Include:
Adam Weishaupt, George Washington, Joseph Warren, Benjamin Franklin, John Paul Jones, Paul Revere, Alexander Hamilton, and the Marquis de Lafayette. Hancock wasn't too bad, but he was gay.
...After this we'll move on to Best Lays of the Civil War, followed by Biggest Dongs of 1812.
Veronica....wish you had taught one of my history classes...sure beats several I've taken....
and the conversation I'd have for cocktail parties....wow!
I'm guessing when it comes to the Civil War that at least one guy from the Confederacy was compensating...otherwise he would have fought on the right (aka winning) side...
History is written by the wieners...
Except for in the case of "Rite of the Revolution." If historical "cock-tail" conversation is your thing, read that.
Hi! My favorite is Jennifer Aniston and I will marry her someday. Whos your favorite celeb and maybe I can get to the unofficial personal site or some nudie shots.