Regardless of whether the JesusFish on your car has feet or not, you cannot deny the sheer awesomeness of this kid. ¡Qué cojones!

If, like me, you would like to watch this video accompanied by Survivor's "Eye of The Tiger," I've taken the liberty of embedding it below. You're welcome.

Except for these gun enthusiasts...

Pennsylvania mom Meleanie Hain made headlines last year when she brought a loaded Glock to her 5-year-old daughter's soccer game. Just in case a bear stormed the pitch and tried to score a goal for the rival Ladybugs squad. Parents were outraged. The NRA cheered.

Last week Meleanie was having a web chat with a friend when her husband Scott shot her with a different 9mm handgun. Scott shot the soccer mom several times, then went upstairs, grabbed a different gun - a shotgun - and blew his brains out. This leaves 3 orphaned soccer lovers. Meleanie's loaded Glock was nearby in her backpack. If only it had been closer she could have defended herself.

Then there was the soon-to-be newlyweds John Tabutt and Nancy Dinsmore. Two 62-year-old Floridians that were supposed to be married today. John heard noises downstairs and was positive it was a fearless cat burglar. A close-by firearm was procurred. John crept down the steps to save the day. These crooks weren't going to get away with stealing his commemorative Dale Earnhardt Jr. collector plates. There was a moving figure in the darkness. John fired. It was Nancy. She's dead. No wedding. No joy in Mudville.

So, other than these poor unfortunate souls, guns will keep you safe.

Have a good weekend ya drunken monkeys...

From The YBNBY International Studies Desk...

Many are surprised at President Barry Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize this morning. Including, I imagine, Obama himself. Sure, at first glance this may the first major award won for Not Being George W. Bush, but at least Europe is hating us less.

Among the shocked were the reporters covering the announcement. They were aghast.



Enjoy the rest of your day listening to the hacks yell that the Nobel Prize has lost all meaning and how "you know, other socialists have won this thing too." Anyone want to wager that there will be a sound bite by the end of the day of someone on Fox News saying "Even Adolf Hitler was nominated for the Nobel Prize by Swedish parliament in 1939!" Good one guys. I'll put the bet on the board at 6-5 and pick'em.

Oh no they didn't.
Oh yes they did. But what the fuck, it's good for publicity. Meaning any press is good press.

Chia Obama is a symbol of liberty, opportunity, and hope. But prosperity?
That remains to be seen.

Point is, yes you can grow a Presidential fro for only $19.95.

Of course, I still like Chia Bush better.

Real or fake? Either way, your kid is stupid and you're a terrible parent.

Earlier this week, we brought you wisecracks relating to Professor Sarah Palin's upcoming book. I liked some of the wiseassery, but sometimes the comedy provides itself.

Such as Good Morning America Spelling Bee Champion Chris Cuomo trying to read the word "rogue" on the prompter. He almost had it.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Moment of Zen - Going Rouge
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Ron Paul Interview

Damn, so close. Of course, maybe Chris meant that the unemployed Facebook updater who is having a hard time booking speaking gigs is turning into "any of various red cosmetics for coloring the cheeks or lips." If that's what he meant or he was making a veiled communist reference, I apologize. Maybe the folks at GMA should try to slip an F-Bomb or "Tits Magee" into prompter to see if Cuomo will go all Ron Burgundy on us.

(Thank you Daily Show)

A public service announcement from Keep America Now. I have a feeling this is too subtle for many.

(via Cynical-C)

Professional Facebook updater Sarah Palin is going to have a book released in November. I have no doubt the tome will be on par with The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin and "Profiles in Courage."

There is even a title. The AP reports the coloring book will be called "Going Rogue: An American Life." Of course, I wouldn't be shocked if the last "G" is dropped from "Going" and it becomes "Goin' Rogue."

I wish we could gamble on how much is written by the unemployed fisherman and how much is by a ghostwriter. I'd would have it at 77% ghostwriter, 20% Sarah Palin, 3% Trig and Track.

Now, the title. "Going Rogue..." Why does that sound familiar? Give me a second ... Oh yeah. By jove, I think I remember. Go to 4:25 into this SNL cold open clip. That's why it rings a bell.



I wonder if other names floated around the fish run included "Fancy Pageant Walkin'", "The Goofy Evolution Museum" and "I'd Like To Use One Of My Lifelines, Katie."

This radio ad was Glenn Beck's first television appearance, in 1986.

The ad summarizes in 30 seconds most of what you need to know about the first 15 years of Beck's radio career.

But if you're interested, there's lots more. Salon has a three-part series on the origins of Glenn Beck, which can also be called his biography. I was fascinated for two reasons: I had never heard of Glenn Beck before he started ranting about how awful the health insurance industry was when he was hospitalized a couple of years ago, and the story hits home as I was a "radio personality" from 1982 to 2006 and can picture the story as if I were there. In fact, in some parts of the story I feel like I was married to Beck! But no, that was another deejay of the same age going through the same things. Even he didn't stoop so low as to talk about a crosstown rival's personal life.

"A couple days after Kelly's wife, Terry, had a miscarriage, Beck called her live on the air and says, 'We hear you had a miscarriage,' " remembers Brad Miller, a former Y95 DJ and Clear Channel programmer. "When Terry said, 'Yes,' Beck proceeded to joke about how Bruce [Kelly] apparently can't do anything right -- about he can't even have a baby."

The series follows Beck up to his first full-time political talk radio show.

New York City has come to a stand-still. Much like blizzards and rat infestations, our fair city seems unable to cope properly when a sitting president comes to town. Obama has been in New York, appearing on Letterman and giving a speech to the United Nations. And since his arrival, our streets have been closed, our subways have been rerouted, and helicopters hover overhead waking our children and dogs. As every other United States President has done since Truman, Obama is staying at the Waldorf-Astoria. And if you've ever wondered what goes into an official "presidential suite," (unlike the one you threw $150 down for at the Holiday Inn in Poughkeepsie) the video above should give you a good indication.

(Via Huffington Post)

Will Ferrell and friends explain how it is, and how you can help the real victims in the current health care debate.

(Thanks, Brother Bill!)

Of all the repercussions from Kanye West's classlessness the other night at the VMA's, this is probably the best. Nothing like a smack down from the Leader of the Free World to put you in your place. Even when your ego is the size of Lake Tahoe and your talent is the size of the Central Park Reservoir.

On his Twitter feed, ABC reporter Terry Moran quoted the President as calling Kanye a "jackass." Awesome. The problem? It was an off-the-cuff and off-the-record comment. There are rules in the press corps, one of the main ones is not printing something when the President isn't on the record. ABC has already yanked the tweet and released a statement saying:

In the process of reporting on remarks by President Obama that were made during a CNBC interview, ABC News employees prematurely tweeted a portion of those remarks that turned out to be from an off-the-record portion of the interview. This was done before our editorial process had been completed. That was wrong. We apologize to the White House and CNBC and are taking steps to ensure that it will not happen again.

Too late, chaps. It's already out there. Kanye, President Obama thinks what most of us think, you are a jackass. Put that in your pipe and take a puff.

The tweet has been pulled down, but I grabbed it before so...

Take that, Slovenia! 37th? No wonder people are protesting! Maybe someday we can overtake the nation ranked #1 in health care.

(via J-Walk Blog)

You guys know as well as anyone that my spelling is not perfect. However, when I have something spelled wrong, there's always someone smarter around to call me on it pretty quickly. Then I correct it as soon as possible. Not everyone is as diligent, or else they are surrounded by people who don't spell any better than they do. Or maybe they just don't care enough to correct the mistake. I've been collecting these misspelled political signs from all over the web for quite some time now, but with the 9/12 march on Washington yesterday, my files are overflowing. I can't vouch that every one is genuine, but at least the majority of them are real.

From The Culinary Arts Desk...

If you have an extra 25 grand in the shoebox above your fridge, you can head to ebay and win a dinner with conversational wizard Sarah Palin and the former First Dude.

Proceeds will go to charity. So far, no takers. Weird. Of course, if you want to have dinner with moronic unemployed bloggers, you can have a meal with Echowood and myself for $77 bucks. Cash. We'll go to John's pizza joint on 44th Street, best in New York. Bring the family! We'll talk about football, pirates and Victorian freak shows. All proceeds will go to our pockets.

I imagine the dinner with the Palin's will be the resurrection of the Algonquin Round Table. An erudite discussion of what newspapers and magazines you read, views of foreign lands from your porch, the joys of hunting from helicopters, witch hunts and how to deal with the meathead that knocked up your daughter.

Only $25,000, kids. Get out your checkbook...