Revelations. It's all about revelations on this week's episode of 1.5 Chords & the Truth. Specifically, revelations about Johnny and his sordid past. As some of you know, Johnny and I were roommates for a year. (Non sexual) And in that time, a few things came to light that were shocking. Horrifying actually. Bits of information that lead me to contact the FBI and look into the witness protection program.

Much like we did on last week's episode, this week's features an Explosion of the Week. Bring it on.

Scientists have discovered that more than two-thirds of female short-nosed fruit bats perform oral sex on their male partners.

The female bats that gave their lovers a generous head start were rewarded with longer love making sessions. The sonar-aided chicks also continued the act during mating. Flexibility is apparently very big in the bat community.

Before this, the only animals other than humans known to perform oral sex were hilarious bonobo chimpanzees. Researchers once thought a lioness was about to perform oral sex on a male lion, but she just bit his wanger off. Didn't really count. When asked about this revelation,

Frans de Waal, a primatologist at Emory University in Atlanta and an expert on bonobo chimpanzees, said: "The finding of fellatio in bats is exciting news."

What a weirdo.

As of press time, there are no confirmations of the animal urban legends of raccoon reach-arounds or antelope autoerotic asphyxiation.

This is so over-the-top that even I, staunch feminist for 40 years, laughed. This aired on the Belgian comedy M!LF, which just illustrates how different TV is outside of the US.

(via Bits and Pieces)

I don't even want to say anything about this, because anything I add would sound like I'm competing for the best caption. Image by Flickr user pinguino.

Steven L. Anderson is a Baptist preacher who gained some notoriety for praying for president Obama to die. In this sermon, he takes an Old Testament passage, in which God tells who is going to die of a certain man's house (apparently He spared women, young children, the elderly, and disabled people) by condemning those who "pisseth against a wall". From this, Anderson takes it as a sign of manhood to pisseth standing up. Now, I don't know exactly what toilet facilities were available in the time of this Biblical passage, but I recall God ordering the tribes of Israel to keep the promised land clean by burying their waste, so I assume that settled areas had outhouses. From a housewife's point of view, outhouses are superior to indoor plumbing in that you don't have to clean them. How you control the pissing against a wall in your home is your own business. I just hope for the sake of Anderson's German in-laws that he has better aim than the average man who is full of himself. There are more video sermons on Anderson's blog, and audio only on the church's website. Or just check out his YouTube channel, but you won't find this particular sermon, as he deleted it. Video doesn't die that easily on the internet, however, so we can still hear this one, helpfully edited to include only the topic of pissing.

(via Buzzfeed)