I no longer hate celebrity deaths for the pain and suffering it brings their families, friends, and fans. Nor do I hate the deaths for the loss of artistic genius. No, I hate celebrity deaths for the onslaught of tweets we get from marginally famous people who jump on the bandwagon quicker than born-again Christians writing letters after an episode of Project Runway. In the race to associate themselves with more talented actors, musicians, and artists, these partial-celebrities attempt to get their 140 character tribute out while the corpse is still warm. We've collected a series of tweets that will undoubtedly go out in the future, once these celebrities kick the bucket.
On the death of Dan Aykroyd by Tyson Beckford...
It looks like the containment grid needs to make room for one more ghost. RIP Dan.
On the death of Martha Stewart by Verne Troyer...
My crème brûlée will never be the same. We'll miss you Martha!
On the death of Jackson Browne by Paris Hilton...
[No tweet due to illiteracy]
On the death of Ellen Degeneres by her brother Vance Degeneres...
Why the fuck did I leave the Daily Show?
On the death of Bill Cosby by Charo...
Siempre será mi pop de budín Jell-O. Te amo, Bill.
On the death of Neil Patrick Harris by Max Casella...
I finally understood why you wanted to share a dressing room. Your stethoscope will always be on my heart.
On the death of Janet Jackson by her sister Rebbie Jackson...
Anyone else remember Centipede? The song, not the video game? Really? No one?
On the death of Kanye West by Kanye West ...
I'm really happy you're dead, I'm gonna let you go to Heaven, but Beyoncé had one of the best deaths of all time!
On the death of Wilford Brimley by Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth...
Holy shit. I didn't know you were still alive. Thought the 'Beetus got you already.
On the death of Huey Lewis by the News...
It's about freaking time you over-shadowing bastard.
On the death of Al Pacino by will.i.am...
say.good.bye.to.my.litt.le.friend
On the death of Rush Limbaugh by the majority of the country...
[Due to mass celebration, no tweets were sent during this period of time.]
(Thanks to Christian Harder for the inspiration)
It looks like the containment grid needs to make room for one more ghost. RIP Dan.
On the death of Martha Stewart by Verne Troyer...
My crème brûlée will never be the same. We'll miss you Martha!
On the death of Jackson Browne by Paris Hilton...
[No tweet due to illiteracy]
On the death of Ellen Degeneres by her brother Vance Degeneres...
Why the fuck did I leave the Daily Show?
On the death of Bill Cosby by Charo...
Siempre será mi pop de budín Jell-O. Te amo, Bill.
On the death of Neil Patrick Harris by Max Casella...
I finally understood why you wanted to share a dressing room. Your stethoscope will always be on my heart.
On the death of Janet Jackson by her sister Rebbie Jackson...
Anyone else remember Centipede? The song, not the video game? Really? No one?
On the death of Kanye West by Kanye West ...
I'm really happy you're dead, I'm gonna let you go to Heaven, but Beyoncé had one of the best deaths of all time!
On the death of Wilford Brimley by Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth...
Holy shit. I didn't know you were still alive. Thought the 'Beetus got you already.
On the death of Huey Lewis by the News...
It's about freaking time you over-shadowing bastard.
On the death of Al Pacino by will.i.am...
say.good.bye.to.my.litt.le.friend
On the death of Rush Limbaugh by the majority of the country...
[Due to mass celebration, no tweets were sent during this period of time.]
(Thanks to Christian Harder for the inspiration)
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Patton Oswalt was on Adam Carolla's podcast this week, and they were talking about this very thing. Quite funny, as you would expect those two to be. I don't listen regularly, but Carolla's podcast can be entertaining with the right guests.
I'm usually a regular listener to the podcast, but this week has been crazy. I'll have to check it out. I'm a big fan of Patton. Thanks!
This is one of those great posts that I wish I'd thought of myself. Nicely done, Echo.
"On the death of Bill Cosby by Charo...
Siempre será mi pop de budín Jell-O. Te amo, Bill."
That's hot, as Paris would say. Big ups.
This has been a bad year in terms of people dropping dead btw.
And how rude of me to pipe in on my first post and not give respect to the original post. Really funny stuff.