From the ever expanding womb
The world of outlandish baby making continues...Reports coming out of Britain suggest a Tunisian woman is set to give birth to 12 babies.
6 boys. 6 girls.
That's 2 coed basketball ball teams, each with a sub.
A baseball team, plus 3 bench players.
And more than an average litter of kittens.
"If the babies are delivered successfully, the Tunisian woman would become the first ever mother of duodecaplets and beat the record of eight children in one birth."
Duodecaplets? Holy cow!
Seriously, that lady has got to be bigger than a cow!
Some may be angered by this continued baby making insanity.
All I can say is thank fucking God!
First off, someone is finally topping that crazy Octomom. I can't think of anything that will destroy that ladies reality show faster than news she's lost her baby world record.
But what I'm most excited about is that a new challenge seems to be emerging.
We all know Mommy Tunisia's record will be short lived. The way In vitro fertilization and the human fascination with world records works, it won't be long before some woman and her Dr. Moreau try to best this mark with tridecaplets (13), quadecaplets (14), or even 15 quindecaplets.
(I'm not making those phrases up.)
Pretty soon, a global competition will commence.
Like the race for the world's fastest man, folks from around the globe will be vying for the title of most babies delivered. Every few months we'll have a new litter of kids and beaming parents at a news conference with their new brood of incubated babies.
And it won't just stop there. New industries will emerge.
- Aerobics instructors will begin teaching intensive uterus stretching classes. Months of training will be needed for these elite women to be successful.
- Eggs will be harvested from ovaries and examined for ultimate multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-multi-birth sustainability.
- Former world record baby holders will be hired as coaches and consultants. (See Octomom lovers, she will have a future!)
- TLC will have a full line up of baby reality shows.
- And ordinary folks will no longer feel the horrible pressure to reproduce with 15, 16, even 20 kids being manufactured almost monthly.
The possibilities are endless really. The baby making madness will continue unchecked. And of course, the ones who will benefit the most from this are, as always, the children.
For it's the children who will be paraded and prodded for our endless curiosity.
As for those brave women out there willing to risk it all for many offspring?
There's just one thing you have to know: Ladies, your vagina's are here for our amusement.
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Jesus, Joseph and Mary. If I was running the world I'd dump frikkin Plan-B into all the water supplies.
BTW, anyone remember the birth in Ireland bit from Monty Python's Meaning of Life? Good stuff.
6 boys and 6 girls all in one sitting. the only person that could possibly get excited about that recently died didn't he?
zing!
Zing!
"First off, someone is finally topping that crazy Octomom. I can't think of anything that will destroy that ladies reality show faster than news she's lost her baby world record."
I think TLC or whatever network she was negotiating either will drop her show or will offer less money. You know, market dictates the prices, and with a duodecamom coming up, who'll need one that had only 8.
Priceless, phatlard, priceless.
I hope those record chasers ladies develop more titties so they can feed all the hungry mouths at once. Talk about a freak show I'd put my money in.
Baier, hat's off to the demotivational poster. Great.
great observation leo. the mind boggles as to how she will feed her litter.
maybe there is some money in extra titty research. i'd like to think we're experts on this matter.
we need a cool name though. only cool named research labs get the big dough.
I think Octo has a documentary airing on FOX later this month.
As for the poster Leo. I can't take credit, it's the work of joycie johnson
http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l315/joyciejohnson/clown_car.jpg
Itty Bitty Titty Committee?
Tittilating Inc.
Bigus Titus Researches Center
We just have to be careful on how we're going to mix the human genes with the multitits gene--and where it'll come from--, or else the ladies may look like this: http://bit.ly/2eUvhX
TiTs R uS
Foundation for Multi Boobness.
I think E and Leo are in the right neighbor hood.
I'll leave the gene splicing to you Leo. I'll handle the cash, cigars, cars and tours of our facillity between 12 and 4, Wednesdays and Thursdays.
I think I can get my hands around human resources.
Good to know there's others pumped about this upcoming multi-baby competition.
Where are the baby daddy's in these situations? Do they just jump out the window or what?
That's what I'd do. Or call an abortionist.
I was gona bounce HR off ya E, but i didn't want to rush it.
get your hands around it. classic.
direct quote from Duodecamom's Husband... "In the beginning, we thought that my wife would give birth to twins but more foetuses were discovered. Our joy increased with the growing number."
Joy? That's not the word that comes to my mind
Joy? I'm a little fuzzy on the whole meaning of joy I guess. I thought I had a decent grasp of the meaning. Obviously not.
Stop the multititties' research! The 12 babies were a bluff. A fraud.
http://bit.ly/1poSEj
Looks like octomom is still holding the clown car pussy record.
Damn. It's a matter of time though.
That's a relief?
I mean, That's a relief!
Noooo... Damnit!
I really thought we had a shot at some federal dollars pork.
The Octomom documentary was on FOX last night. I caught 30 seconds of it - she went to get a tattoo of her children at midnight. The kids were with their nannies.
That was all the trash I needed to see.
Click, back to the Yanks vs. Oakland.