I've had it with the animal kingdom and their constant hiding behind the WWF. Where are the conservationists when sharks attack surfers? Where were the lobbyists when that German woman fell into the Polar Bear enclosure? It's time to take the world back from these death valets. I for one, will not remain wide awake at night for fear a crazed white-tailed deer makes it's way into my apartment building, past the doorman, through a series of locked doors, and uses my head as it's chew-toy. This is why I'm happy we have people like Kenyan farmer, Ben Nyaumbe. According to this article by Reuters, while tending to his fields and minding his own business, this python wraps around Nyaumbe's body and hauls him up a tree. With nothing else to do to defend himself, Nyaumbe takes a chunk out of the snake with a few of his incisors. Nyaumbe escaped with minor bruises, but the snake is still at large.

I say bring on the deforestation. Survival of the fittest bitches!