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Haterade's Idol Anal-ysis: Round of 9

Today is April Fool's Day. But someone will not be in a happy mood this evening. Haterade, fresh off last week's correct prediction, will tell you who's chance of winning American Idol just got toilet papered.

This week's theme is popular downloads on I-Tunes. This should be a very easy theme, but as song selection is everything, I expect at least 2 or 3 contestants to fall into the 'self-indulgence' trap, meaning that singers will select songs that they like, instead of songs that the public will vote for. The vocalists get a tour of the digital world, and a tour of America's Top Forty - which, of course, is hosted by Idol's Ryan Seacrest. Pimping yourself out is everything.

Anoop Desai pimps himself out on Usher's 'Caught Up'.
The Good: He woke up on the second half of the song. I disagree that it was the wrong sort of song for him. It was actually a good selection of song. And during the refrain at the end he did display some nice vocal pipes.
The Bad: The problem, and Kara nailed this on the head, is that he did absolutely nothing with this first 95% of the song. This is a song begging to be played with and rifted all over the place. Despite that invite to do so, Anoop sung it by the numbers, which reeked of Karaoke. And it felt like he was a frat boy trying to down a glass of beer, because the opening pitch was 'Caught Up' in the pipes of one of those kegs and the end felt like he swallowed some of the words along with his shot glass.
The Jason: Way wrong song choice. No energy at all. He looked stiff as a board. This is not his style of music. The judges were right on the money tonight.
The Verdict: This was Karaoke to the hilt. It wasn't indulgent (because I thought it was a good song choice), but the fact that this was forgettable means that he could have issues tomorrow night.

Megan Joy can't blame her choices on music selection this time - she has a huge catalog of choices. She thinks the judges will feel her on 'Turn The Lights Down Low'
The Good: This is actually the best in pitch that she's been during the entire competition. In fact, I'll say that this is the best that I've heard her sing ever.
The Bad: Unfortunately, the song is so limited in range with 3 or 4 notes at the most is that this is a terrible choice of song to try to capture America's vote. A song that you want to sing because you like it is the sterling definition of 'indulgence'. And the missed end notes combined with the horrid tremolo made me want to turn the volume (instead of the lights) down low.
The Jason: Again...wrong song choice. And the Amy Winehouse style of vocal trills are just terrible. End the misery now.
The Verdict: At least the other songs that Megan did were memorable (for one reason or another). This was plain boring, and that can get her into trouble this week.

Danny Gokey decides to goes back to country with Rascal Flats 'What Hurts The Most'. He wants to tone it down and focus more on singing than performing. Can he make sure that what hurts the most isn't our eardrums?
The Good: Much, much better than last week. This is a Danny Gokey that I was hoping we'd be seeing more of. What I liked the best was that last note, which is tempting to screech, but he sang with a refined tone and held it back, which is how the song is supposed to go.
The Bad: The opening sort of scared me. He did recover, but I thought Rascal Flats was going to go after him with a machete if he continued to stay off key. And a boo to Randy who wanted to see Danny move around with the microphone stand. Didn't you have enough of that for the past 2 weeks?
The Jason: Nice, albeit safe performance. Missed some notes, but did enough to get through.
The Verdict: I think there could be a little surprise in the bottom 3 tonight (more on that later). However, I don't think Danny will be part of the surprise.

Allison Iraheta decides that No Doubt's 'Don't Speak' would be a nice way to get the votes coming to her. Will there be no doubt about that in her performance?
The Good: Of course, being that this is a song she idolized since she was a little girl, she's going to be technically proficient, which she is. She doesn't have a problem with either the pitch or the tone.
The Bad: Though she stayed in tune on the guitar, she didn't come close to staying in time or in rhythm. I hated the 'La las' - sure, they are supposed to be there, but it makes the audience that's not familiar with the song believe that you don't remember the words. And the whole outfit made her look like one of those punked out trolls that you had on the end of your pencils in the 1980's while wearing a kilt and trying to superimpose a candy cane on the rest of your dress. And a special boo to Paula, who added Allison in the final two along with Lil, Adam and Danny.
The Jason: Kick ass attitude brings this home. The girl has a set of pipes. However, Simon was right. The stylist dressed her as if she was 5 years old in her mother's closet trying on a big hat, fake pearl jewelry and a housecoat from 1975. The stylist needs to be put out in the back and shot. Literally. I mean this.
The Verdict: Have you seen the commercials with the little girl saying she was a big girl trying to find a big girl car seat? This remind me of a little 16 year old girl trying to emulate Gwen Stefani while staring at her No Doubt posters in her room. Alexis Grace did that 2 weeks ago and it led to her departure. Could history repeat itself here?

Scott MacIntyre doesn't want to repeat history at all, as he was in the bottom 3 last week. He goes for 'Just the Way You Are' by Billy Joel, as he is one of Scott's idols. Scott wants an intimate evening with him and the piano. Is America ready to be intimate with Scott?
The Good: Excellent choice of song. And an excellent performance. This is a great definition of making the song your own and putting your own spin on it. Where has this been for the past few weeks?
The Bad: With the black leather jacket and the mullet-style 80's hairdo, when Scott's done with the Idol tour, he can work for Bauser when he decides to reformat Sha-Na-Na for the 15th time.
The Jason: A one note performance from the same sort of performer. It was boring, it was bland, it was passionless. It was pitchy and his notes were all over the place. The judges were way wrong on this.
The Verdict: I disagree with Jason here. Great choice of song. Took some risks and it paid off. Not only will he not have any problems in the bottom 3, but he put Matt Giraud on notice to step up and do the same thing, or Matt's going to have some serious issues tomorrow.

And speaking of which, Matt Giraud, had decided to select a song not on the advice of the judges, but to sing the song for him. Uh oh. I'm hoping that 'You Found Me' by The Fray doesn't scream of indulgence.
The Good: ...The jacket looked nice?
The Bad: Paula is 100% right. Between the horribly growly voice, the un-Matt rock song vibe and the lack of pitch on the high notes, this reminds me of Matt's performance of Coldplay - the one that eliminated him in Group 2. And the swarm of women waving their hands around him felt like they were being trained to feign interest so they could receive their rave drug of choice after the song by Ryan Pavlov.
The Jason: His performance was too vibrato and pitchy. His notes were all over the place and he screamed the song. Song choice, song choice, song choice.
The Verdict: Matt tells Ryan Seacrest that he wants to show America that R&B is not the only thing he can do. So far, all America has seen that it IS the only thing that he can do competently. This week, Matt knew he was in a death battle with Scott to get those share of piano votes and Scott won that battle, hands down. Matt could have some serious issues tonight.

Will Lil Rounds have issues? Because the judges didn't like her song choice last week, Lil goes for...Celine Dion's 'I Surrender'? I don't like it already...
The Good: I'll give her points for difficulty. It's a very hard song to perform. She did pull it out in the second half of the song and she is showing her diversity...
The Bad: ...but I wonder if it's at the cost of what brought her here to begin with. This is such a bad song choice in so many different ways. It's very adult contemporary, very old and doesn't match Lil's fan base. Her pitch at the beginning of the song made my eardrums want to surrender. And a special boo to Ryan for a cheap pop with Lil's kid.
The Jason: I felt the emotion, but she missed a few notes. Great job overall, though.
The Verdict: The Lil Rounds that people were raving about was the contemporary R&B singer with swagger that could diva out a contemporary song. Lil has no problems tonight, but we want that swaggering diva Lil back. Maybe she's hiding somewhere in Allison Iraheta's candy cane dress.

Adam Lambert last week was stripped down...vocally (Minds. Out Of. Gutter. People.). This week, he wants to go back to being over the top with 'Play That Funky Music' by Wild Cherry.
The Good: That was a very smart choice to convert the song into a rock-funk hybrid. It made the song hip and current, plus it gave him a chance to improvise his vocals. People like Anoop Desai and Matt Giraud need to take notes. He nailed the money notes, as can be expected. And he gets bonus marks for crediting Ricky Minor.
The Bad: What's up with every guy wearing a black jacket of some sort? Sure it's his look, but can't we get any originality around here? With his constant dipping, it felt like this was Adam's audition video to replace Richard Simmons.
The Jason: For the second week in a row, he absolutely killed it. His performances are totally fresh and original and are reminding me of when David Cook came out of nowhere to put a stranglehold on the top spot. If he keeps this up, he is a lock for the final.
The Verdict: Best performance of the night. He killed the song. And he may have killed someone else in the process.

Finally, Kris Allen ends the night with 'Ain't No Sunshine'...on the keyboard. Kris wants to make the song memorable. What sort of moment will we get?
The Good: Like Adam, Kris converts the song to a funky R&B acoustic/acapella hybrid with violins in the background. This is a really nice melodic song. Job well done. And Kara got her number counting abilities back on track.
The Bad: If you're going after the David Archuleta vote, you may as well make the same errors that he makes - most noticeably, singing with your eyes shut. You should be making love to the camera, not looking like you're going to fall asleep and ask for a reconvening the next morning.
The Jason: Liked the arrangement. Good, solid performance.
The Verdict: I thought it was the second best performance of the night. The mainstream audience may consider it the best. Regardless, he's safe, and may give the audience sunshine when another singer is gone.

Overall Verdict: For a show where the leeway goes to the contestants, I was severely disappointed with some of the caliber of the earlier efforts tonight. We know who can be artists and who are just singers. However, there can only be 3 bottom feeders, so I have to choose. And my choice is...

Trouble: Megan Joy, Allison Iraheta, Matt Giraud

Last week, you had Michael go away because the people in the same genre smoked him. This week, you have the same scenario pop up - Matt Giraud's piano playing opponents (Scott MacIntyre and Kris Allen) gave 2 of the 3 best performances of the night, and any rock base that Matt was trying for probably gets dismantled care of Adam's nice performance tonight. To add to it, Scott's fan base knew he was in trouble from last week and is going to vote in droves to keep him in the competition. Megan will join Matt in the bottom 2, and it won't shock me if the audience finally gets rid of her, but Matt gave us what got him knocked out in Group 2, and it's going to knock him out here as well.

OUT: Matt Giraud

The Jason: It is obvious who is going home, because if Megan stays another week, we might see Sanjaya-like riots on the internet. There is no way she survives another week - but who goes with her? Anoop Dawg was out of his element, so he joins her on the stool., but the third seat is a coin flip between Allison and Matt. I'll choose Matt.

Trouble: Trouble: Megan Joy, Anoop Desai, Matt Giraud

OUT: Megan Joy

Join us in 24 hours to see who will have plenty of time to think of next year's April Fools gags.
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3 Comments

I hope you're wrong Haterade..Megan needs to go because when she sings, it sounds like animals are being slaughtered. Matt did pick kind of a crappy song, but at least he has talent.
I still don't know what to make of Adam..I mean, he looked and sounded HOT last week..but last night, his high notes sounded like he was screeching..and not in a good way.

Okay, back to real life now :)

said CindylovesScara on April 1, 2009 4:06 PM.

Hey Cindy -

I hope I'm wrong, too. And I would be if it's get rid of the singer that you hate the most. Unfortunately, it's get rid of the singer that you like the least, and if everyone else is going to vote for Scott, Kris and Adam (which they should), I don't know how Matt is going to get his votes. If Megan leaves tonight it's not a shock - I have her in my bottom two - but usually, the worst singer doesn't leave until a shocking favorite goes home, and I think the departure of Matt may be the catalyst that causes the public to vote for their favorites.

G.

said Haterade on April 1, 2009 6:13 PM.

But would the judges save Matt? I think they might.

said CindylovesScara on April 1, 2009 6:48 PM.
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