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Real Men Love Cats
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Real men love cats. No, not the 80's Andrew Lloyd Webber musical, but the actual animal. And I'm talking about straight, intelligent, and non-crazy men. I'd count myself as part of that group.

I'm no longer afraid to admit it. I love my cat. I'm proud of the love I have for my cat. My cat, Tulagi (pictured above), has been with me for over eight years, and she represents the single greatest relationship I've ever had with anything. (Emotional, not physical you perverts.) And according to this article in the New York Times, I'm not alone. Here are some quotes:
Only intelligent, aware, caring men love cats
...only pillars of virility and masculinity would dare to own one. [Cat lovers] are quick to point out other well-known macho cat owners: Ernest Hemingway, Mark Twain, Victor Hugo and Marlon Brando, who reportedly found a stray cat on the set of "The Godfather" and incorporated it into a scene.
"[Men who own cats] make the best boyfriends because they're totally cool with staying home and watching a movie," said Elizabeth Daza, 28, a video producer in Manhattan, who dated a cat-owning man for eight years. "Straight men with cats seem to be really secure and stable. They don't need to be running around the park and proving their masculinity like the dog guys."
I told you I was the epitome of masculinity. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go pick up cat-puke off my rug.
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44 Comments

Big cats are dangerous but a little pussy never hurts.

said E on October 8, 2008 1:52 PM.

Bro, I am busy as hell and don't have time to be writing this, but I felt that I needed to let you know that this is the dumbest article that you have ever written.
The only thing a cat is good for is killing mice. If a cat isn't used as a mouse killing tool he is no good.
Cats are horrible companions. There is no give in the relationship from the cat. It is take take take.
A real man owns a dog.
And yes, I am the authority on what a real man is.
I own a Labrador Retriever and I am a real man.
If you were to make a masculinity comparison between you and I, though compared with most New Yorkers your masculinity may be high, my masculinity would make your masculinity comparable to that of Clay Aiken.
My advise Ech,o is to kick the cat to the curb and buy a dog.
You will soon find that women will no longer look to you as a shopping partner, or a fasion advisor, but will be jumping you like a fricken trampoline.

Love always.

Dave


said Dave on October 8, 2008 2:01 PM.

Sage advice, as always.

That response is as good as any 'challenge' response as far as I am concerned.

said Tim on October 8, 2008 2:09 PM.

Very well said Dave! There's nothing likable about cats, never liked them, never will. Only good one is a wet kittycat...

said etantao on October 8, 2008 2:10 PM.

Cats are only good in a cat vs. monkey fight, and only then if the monkey is not allowed the use of pistols.

said Don't Swayze Bro on October 8, 2008 2:10 PM.

Echo is it confession week out there? First you tell us to check out Gigli, then you tell us your into amphibious sports (or whatever) now you got a thing for cats.

BTW, what's your favorite Clay Aiken album?

said E on October 8, 2008 2:13 PM.

I agree with Echo, cats rule.

Course by saying that I realize I'm probably validating all the dissenters comments above.

said Baierman on October 8, 2008 2:16 PM.

Cats ROCK! Why all the cat hate? When did you all become cat-bashers? My cat has her own personality, style, and sophistication - AND she did my income taxes this year!

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on October 8, 2008 3:28 PM.

The cat hate is simply illustrating their (Dave's) station as unintelligent, unaware, and uncaring men. I know I'll sleep more soundly tonight knowing that I'm a pillar of masculinity and virility. Perhaps their cat hate is simply a defense for hiding who they're ashamed to be.

said Echowood on October 8, 2008 5:47 PM.

So is Misther Tulami both you and JOhnnie's cat?

If so, Who is the mommy and who is the daddy?

said Dave on October 8, 2008 5:48 PM.

Touché. Miss Tulagi, is mine and mine alone. Though, I'm assuming with Johnny's love of all things Papa, he wouldn't be averse to owning a cat, especially a six-toed one.

And Johnny and I raised her in a situation not unlike that of Paul Reiser and Greg Evigan.

said Echowood on October 8, 2008 5:52 PM.

I actually own both. Well, the cat was a secondary pickup purely to provide companionship/food for my lab. Unfortunately, the cat has started acting with less than desirable behavior: peeing in random places, etc. Pretty much not acceptable and it's made me revert to my cat-hating days (when i would torture my girlfriend's cat while she slept purely for the joy of it).

However, big cats are very cool. I'm talking about the lions, tigers, panthers, etc. Those animals are pretty amazing and the house cat is generally just a midget version. Except the midget-action is nearly as funny or humorous as the homo sapiens variety.

said BiPolar on October 8, 2008 6:02 PM.

I love cats... but i can never eat a whole one

i owned a cat and the only thing funny about it was when it constantly jumped in the toilet because it was to stupid to learn i never put the lid down for him like his old owner used to.

said Angie on October 8, 2008 6:06 PM.

Echo....should I be more ashamed of your My Two Dads reference, or the fact that I recognized it?

So let me get this straight...Miss Tulagi's mom died without knowing whether you or Johnny was the father, so she left her to both of you to raise....

I'm not even going to touch the idea that you are both into bestiality (let alone shared the same pussy), so I'm going to assume that you meant that (very, very) loose comparison in the "we're both straight and raised her" vein instead.

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 6:30 PM.

Unintelligent-Yes, I agree, in college I studied the control of vibration in carbon fiber space structures. I also researched and revolutionised the joining of steel to carbon fiber.
My English kind of blows, so I guess that makes me dumb.
Ease up, not all of us hold communication degrees.

unaware-I am aware of the bumper sticker that reads "Cats! Because not all gay men can own a monkey."

uncaring-Echo, I care. That one really hurt.

said Dave on October 8, 2008 6:41 PM.

As a man who has cats, I must unfortunately draw your attention to this article at Slate.com where they tore apart this bullshit article about the male's with cats trend.

http://www.slate.com/id/2201764/

said kbk on October 8, 2008 7:05 PM.

Echo--I'm going to have to defend Dave here...no one who owns a Labrador can be considered dumb or uncaring....Labs are smart dogs and would make a run for it...

I used to love cats then became allergic to them--so I'm a dog person now...but I will also say that it's more likely that a straight man owns a cat than owns a little white fluffy dog or Chihuahua (in either case, all by himself--if the female in the house chose the animal then all bets are off).

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 7:08 PM.

"said Elizabeth Daza, 28, a video producer in Manhattan, who dated a cat-owning man for eight years"

wait....she dated him for 8 years. Uh, he might like to stay at home but it sounds like he had commitment issues as well.
8 years? Really?

Or, maybe he wasn't so straight after all.....

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 7:11 PM.

So basically, that lady probably dated the dude since high school.
Eight years and they broke it off. (Assuming she or he ended the relationship at least two years ago. A safe assumption because she is comfortable referring to the failed relationship.

Perhaps 8 years of watching that dude sit on the couch rubbing his puss, really didn't quite do it for her.

I seriously have a picture in my mind of Johnny and Echo sitting on the couch playing dress up with their cats.

Echo: Johnny, that outfit you have Papa puss in looks sooooo fab. I want it!

Johnny: Yes Air Bear, but not near as cute as Miss puss over there. How did you get her collar to shine like that.

Echo:Oh just a little lovum for my kitter katter. How about we stay home and watch Steel Magnolias tonight?

Johnny:You read my mind. I'll make hot cocoa if you'll grab some blankets.


said Dave on October 8, 2008 7:40 PM.

Dave....I worry about your active imagination...or are you just a peeping Tom?

But 8 years? Shit or get off the pot......geez...

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 7:45 PM.

Dave, c'mon. You know JW is a coffee man!

said Tim on October 8, 2008 9:15 PM.

Tim, are you saying my peeping tom theory is right?

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 9:21 PM.

JW's from Seattle. Gotta be a coffee man ... no peeping required.

said Tim on October 8, 2008 9:54 PM.

Thanks for the reminder....
but you have to admit, the details that Dave included....eerie....

or maybe it's just a fantasy...and if so, I probably don't need to know--forget I mentioned it...

said sarcastic one on October 8, 2008 9:58 PM.

The best thing about cats is: Cat nip, laser pens, scotch tape and enough time to fuck with them til they give up.

I used to live next door to a old Japanese guy in Hawaii who used to capture cats that strayed into his yard in live trap cages. Then he would go out and turn the hose on them several times a day for a couple days. He said it kept them from comming back but it seemed like he almost always had a cat in the cage.

We used to sit on the lanai and drink and watch the show. Was some of the hardest times i ever laughed.

said phatlard on October 8, 2008 11:33 PM.

I'm proud to say that i am the owner of a psychotic clawed ball of fur that resembles a cat. Her name is Cheeto. She is the only cat i have seen that can climb paneling.

said Sheriff Pablo on October 8, 2008 11:41 PM.

Not a big fan of cats. They're always in my ceiling, watching me masturbate, trying to has my cheezburger, or stealing my bukkits.

Although, they are quite handy with computers. They have a knack for upgrading my ram.

said Your mom's new boyfriend on October 9, 2008 12:33 AM.

Whats with all the guys freaking out over cats?

Out of all the things you can get pissed about you pick the guy who owns a cat?

get over it, trying to prove your masculinity on the internet is oxymoronic.


said Dom on October 9, 2008 2:26 AM.

Wow SP. I thought I had the only cat that can climb paneling. We call her Spidey-Cat sometimes. Her name is Kamora, and she too is psychotic.

phatlard - That's just wrong. As punishment, you'll be reincarnated as a stray cat in Vietnam. That'll learn ya.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on October 9, 2008 8:30 AM.

There is a lot flawed with this whole thing.

I've found that most people that are "cat people" have never owned a dog, or never owned a dog under their accord (it was a dog or breed that they didn't choose or endorse).

The biggest thing I've noticed with cats is how people will tolerate things they would never tolerate from people.

I don't know how many times I've been at someone's place with a cat and been warned or informed at some point that the cat is temperamental or is prone to scratching people or just generally a bitch of a cat, but "that's just who he/she is and we love him." That's if the cat isn't a hermit who only appears every 3 days.

That's the most humorous thing about cats, is that if that cat was a boyfriend or girlfriend, in the majority of cases that relationship would either not last long or be criticized by all their friends.

"He only shows up when he wants, he never pays for anything, he hits me when I try to cuddle, and he leaves half-eaten meals all over the place. Not to mention the incessant whining at any time of the night."

The point is, when you look at cats and then look at dogs, who are constantly happy and aim to please, maybe thats why so many woman prefer cats. Afterall, we all know how most woman can't avoid being bored with a guy who is too subservient.

And maybe its those overly nice subservient guys who prefer cats, too. If you're a guy who'd put up with a more controlling and possibly abusive girlfriend, then a cat would be a more fitting pet than a dog.

You also have to look at where people live. You can't compare people living in apartments or condos with people in houses. You cannot reasonably care for a mid- to large-size dog in small places like that.

So all these people in the article that own cats probably couldn't own dogs anyway, at least not a dog other than the often yappie and more ill-tempered lap dog breeds. Of course a cat would be considered more masculine than a shih tzu or a pomeranian.

said serotonin on October 9, 2008 10:13 AM.

I have a cat. She can be a monster, and I'm a little afraid of her sometimes.

I've fought with her before. Bloody, scarring fights, resulting in her being locked out on the balcony for days, growling and hissing at the door the whole time. Unbelievable intensity in her hate.

Then it blew over. She was sitting there looking at me through the glass door, meowing pitifully. I let her back in, there was a bit of nervous tension for a day, then life was back to normal.

The escalation of her aggression became very limited after the spaying, too.

And the fights? Always my fault. For all her faults, my cat's pretty polite, if not exactly tolerant, and she provided me a gauge on my personality. I wasn't really aware of how aggressive I seem to others until I saw how much I scare my cat without meaning to.

And she's a beautiful cat, for a monster. When she's happy and sweet, it's awesome.

I don't hate dogs in the least. I find them mostly congenial company. I don't have a dog because I hate going outside, and dogs have to be walked. And when they get spastically happy, it can be annoying after a while.

People that hate cats are truly disturbing. I don't think allergies are an excuse, either. Cats don't decide to make you sick, that's a malfuntion of your own immune system, so I can't help but feel the animosity is being transferred.

Cats do that, too.

Cats cannot be directly controlled. You can train a dog to do almost anything, and on command, but a cat is pretty much hardcoded, so unacceptable behavior has to be changed surreptitiously, with great patience. You need workarounds. That's why some people hate cats. They accept no masters.

You can't easily change a cat, so sometimes, you have to change.

But some people can't take criticism, and cats can be very harsh critics.

And I have no idea how anyone can hate dogs.

Real men don't love cats. Real men love what they love, and anyone else's opinion on that love or the object of that love can be stored by the opinion-holder rectally in a horizontal positon.

said Baldo on October 9, 2008 12:06 PM.

Here are my main reasons for owning a cat.

I live in michigan. Mid winter the temperature around here approaches 15 below zero. - You don't have to walk a cat.

also I have owned several dogs. And a cat never chews up your shoes / magazines / VHS tapes. (My previous dog ate an entire rubber bathmat. He was shitting little pieces of it for a week.)

Cats are pretty low maintainance animals, but unlike hamsters, are far more entertaining.

said Sheriff Pablo on October 9, 2008 12:50 PM.

Hi Echo,

Tulagi is a lovely looking cat. I have two cats and, if I could, I'd have more but I don't want to be known and the crazy cat lady. One commenter said when he got a dog, the cat started peeing in bad places, etc. That's because the cat is pissed at you, silly. Cats are very perceptive. When my ex started cheating on me, he'd crawl into his closet and piss on his clothes. My cat was trying to tell me the man was bad. My cats have never, ever done anything like that to me, my personal clothes or apartment. They are both very loving and cuddly and sweet. I like that you love your cat, Echo. You seem very cool to me now!

said Katherine the Great on October 9, 2008 1:23 PM.

Your mom's new boyfriend,
well said my friend.

said E on October 9, 2008 2:07 PM.

Ahem.....If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat is like a dog, but gay -- it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog... "Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here, Killer!" Now think about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay. :-)

said Bigus Dickus on October 10, 2008 10:31 AM.

You know we had to give you shit on this

said Bigus Dickus on October 10, 2008 10:34 AM.

Non sequitur...but did anyone else notice how this story recommends itself underneath? Usually it links to the author's other works, but this apparently was worth a second read (and actually, it was...)

said sarcastic one on October 10, 2008 10:38 AM.

C'mon guys... Echo is talking about REAL MEN, not real Neanderthals! All other things being equal and as a real woman I'll just say that the cat lover guy will always be soooo much hotter than the snoop doggy dogger type walking Rex on a leash. While I can easily forgive dog deficiencies such as being unable to purr or instill any sort of subtlety in their over-exaggerated emotional displays, I just can't understand why is it that canines always feel compelled to sniff at your crotch and drool all over you for no reason (and that includes Labs as well -- sorry Dave). Ah, yes: Neanderthal mimickry. Which doesn't preclude that some Neanderthal women will not necessarily respond well to the stellar levels of sophistication, nuance, elegance and aesthetics which felines tend to consistently project and convey. Well then, give those gals the drooling and crotch sniffing by Rex -- and owner, of course, not to mention the leash... Everyone should be able to live a happy life with the perfectly suited pets & partners, right? :-p @ ;-)
PS -- Wonderful picture on top of thread!

said EUnity on October 25, 2008 4:47 PM.

How come we have to choose dogs or cats? I was raised with both and both species played a role in the household. If you can respect each for what they bring to the table there is no need to choose which one is better than the other. If someone wants a cat, are we really going to label them because we have a different preference?

said mae on November 12, 2008 1:34 PM.

EUnity- To your comment :"I just can't understand why is it that canines always feel compelled to sniff at your crotch"

I have never had a problem with dogs sniffing my crotch.
I've noticed that if you keep your crotch well maintained dogs really have no interest in it.
If your crotch is smelly enough to have every dog drawn to it, more than likely you may want to hit it with a little soap and water. I suggest a good scrubbing. If you still have the problem after a good scrubbing, douse your junk with a little gold bond.
Not only will the dogs stay away but you will feel like a million bucks.

I hope that helps.

Dave

said Dave on November 12, 2008 2:39 PM.

Hah. You need to own a dog to feel like a man? An animal that won't do tricks on command or blindly accepts your orders makes you feel less of a man? That's pretty gay right there.

My family and I owned pure-bred German Shepherds from the time I was a little kid to when I joined the military (mandatory military service as a German). I had several that were bonded to me (i.e. they picked me out as their "master", so to speak). We also have a dog training facility in my town so dog ownership there is quite common. The last dog I owned, Ringo, was highly intelligent, aggressive and very protective of me and my family. We were offered $10,000 German Marks (1982) for the dog from several professional breeders, which we of course refused. We don't sell family members.

After my military stint my sister dropped off a stray kitten they found at my apartment. I named her Gypsy Rose. We hit it off really well right away.

Gypsy passed away a few years ago at the age of 16 and she was the greatest cat and one of the best animal friends I've ever had, every bit as loving and beneficial to my life as my dog Ringo was, if not more so. She was highly intelligent, playful, very loving and protective of me, in her cat way.

My ex-wife, who turned bitch on me after we got married, remarked to me once "How come the cat only breaks my stuff and never yours?".

"Cause YOU'RE the bitch....", I would think to myself.

My girlfriend and I currently have four cats (had two each, all rescued from the pound), they are all very well behaved, don't need walks, are very clean animals, very loving and also sneaky, conniving and brutally honest in their relationship with humans. Each one has a very distinct personality and they all get along and play with each other. We couldn't imagine living without at least a couple of cats around (always get cats in pairs, at a minimum - tons more fun).

My latest cat buddy, Mort, came to us from the street as a kitten. He loves to steal my cigarettes out of my pack and will freakin' do it right in front of me. Whereas every other cat will run away from a vacuum cleaner, Mort will actually force you to push him with the vacuum before he'll move. Very little fear in that cat. If I have to work on computer equipment or appliances, he will be right there to push tools around and use his nose to sniff-test each component. He'll stick around and help me through the entire process. I think he's watching . . . learning . . . for eventual world domination.

Dogs are very cool in their way and cats are very cool in their own way. I highly recommend both.

said Catman on December 3, 2008 7:02 PM.

Cats are purely demonic. A dog is a man's best friend. Black Labrador Retrievers being the example par excellence.

That said, a cat adopted me about a year and a half ago. I have to say that for a cat, he's about as macho as it gets. He's also kind of clutzy. He gets a LOT of compliments as being the cutest cat anyone's laid eyes on (He looks like a fancy Starbucks latte with whipped cream and blue eyes, fwiw). He doesn't bother me too much. I can tell he likes me, though. When I'm home, he comes home. When I'm away, he goes out and cats around.

He's also well-trained. Through a few trial-and-error sessions we've come to a few agreements: He doesn't EVER *really* bite me directly (through a blanket is fine or when he needs to warn me that something really does bother him); that's a near-death experience sentence. He does not claw me. He does not unravel toilet paper. He does not play with electric cords (I just can't bring myself to let him find out the hard way). He knows when papa means business, he means business. He knows when I'm playing with him and when he's in trouble (which, btw, the latter is far less likely than the former).

All in all, he's a pretty cool cat and he earns his keep.

I'd still have to say I prefer dogs, but if I do get to move overseas as planned, I'm checking out the options for taking my little buddy with me.

said Mort on January 16, 2009 12:08 PM.

Uhhh...as a major dick-sucking homo I have to tell you guys some bad news. I like 'em closeted, so this is sort of a specialty of mine. BY FAR the best marker for "under the radar" homos is cat-hatred. Married guys on Craigslist (an old specialty of mine). Dudes who are Republican and 'bisexual.' The neanderthal at the garage with hands that looked like dinosaur gristle who grabbed my dick when he saw the porno mag in my trunk: ALL FUCKING CAT HATERS.

Don't take my word for it - ask your gay friends: out of the closet gay guys are obsessed with DOGS. Little yappy dogs, giant clumsy dogs, mutts, etc. etc. All you have to do is go to Fire Island and listen during cocktail hour to hear a bunch of gay men clucking like hens about their dogs and how much they love them, etc. etc. Look in the Advocate - all you see are ads with gay couples and their lab/Jack Russel/whatever. Never a cat.

On the flip side, lesbians (and straight women) tend to have cats all over the place.

Frankly, I think being male and liking dogs is like having a dick: it's true for all men, straight or gay. It's only guys who are trying to throw out some weirdly contrived masculine vibe who say they hate cats. And once again, that goes for gay guys trying to look masculine and straight guys trying the same.

Me, I like 'em both.

said Yeek on September 3, 2009 4:26 PM.

why do people like to simplify cats and dogs into human genders?

I like cats and dogs
I love wolves and lions. The latter live lives on the edge. In a one to one situation, they are our equals or better. I really respect them. The former I'm allowed to have as pets. Still respect them a bit, but they are mostly extensions of their owners, for whom my respect is a toss up.

Individual animals have distinct personalities that can be interpreted in a variety of ways. Tomcats can be very masculine little Rambos. I remember a cat that faced off with a German shep. And won. Even with overwhelming physical power the dog lost its nerve and walked. I've seen a male cat that run from a spraycan all the way to the end of a street. The frightful look in his eyes. Save it for Armageddon.
Male cats can be highly territorial. The fights can be rough to watch. I throw water on 'em . I love to watch the disgust in their eyes as they stop fighting, look at each other and then at me before they run off their separate ways all in about 2 seconds.. They like to bully the weaker cats if allowed.
With cats you can't be sure of their love. You have to assume it. I always wondered that if I should suddenly find myself less than 1 foot tall, what reaction to me would my cat have? Friend or dinner?

I've only had 2 cats as pets my entire life, but I'm often friends with neighbourhood roaming cats. Problems have arisen when I let people house sit for me. but I let em know to expect some strange visitations. May prove a problem if I move and the next people move in.. I hardly ever feed them but they still visit. One cat I know visits quite a few cat loving people most everyday, and I would feel a little jealous if I saw a neighbor playing with him and he didn't visit me

One place I lived had a feral female cat in the 'hood that was always getting into people's bedrooms and taking a monster shit on their sheets. They used to talk of how such a little cat could have such sized shits. After a while that cat was never heard from again, but I noticed that a man further down the street with usually a dour mood seemed quite chipper after that .

A strange incident : My 1st pet was a rabbit when I was six. It got out of the house once without me knowing and a while later I saw it in the back yard surrounded by maybe 10 cats. They were in a perfect circle, just staring at the perfectly still rabbit. I shushed them away and grabbed the rabbit who was unharmed. About a week later my rabbit was dead, seemingly assassinated by a cat. I never knew what to make of it. I got a cat a year later and those same cats terrorized her. I kid you not. She was always a nervous wreck when I took her outside.

judge each animal by its own individual merits and don't generalize and stigmatize. Know that we humans have much yet to learn about these creatures that still live in their own world though we take more of it away everyday, including their very natures

said lesaracen on January 8, 2010 6:08 PM.
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