A mash up that works the way it should. Richard Simmons and Unk's song has just got me rolling.

Even cat lovers will laugh to see how well this works. You might feel guilty afterward, but you'll laugh.

Have a cat that won't stay off your counters? I do. I finally got fed up with it enough to do something about it: scare the crap out of him with a motion-detecting blender (while recording the results for my own amusement, of course).

(via Cynical-C)

The folks who brought you the Literal Take On Me followed that up with Head Over Heels by Tears for Fears. Smooth!

(via b3ta)

If you live near Portland, you're one lucky SOB....

A secret screen of The Watchmen that will take place in Portland, Oregon tonight. The movie is scheduled to show at the Regal Lloyd Center 10 Theater in Portland at 7pm.

Supposedly the screening has no passes and they'll just be recruiting people at the theater that night. So if you decide to go, it's probably a good idea to play dumb.

Pretend you have no idea about the film or the graphic novel and you just came out to see Max Payne or that dumb dog movie.

I'm hopping on a plane right now. Save me a seat!

Our friends over at Double Viking have the perfect calendar for Halloween and Fangoria fans. Check out the Zombie Pin-Up girls and enjoy the beauty of gore all year long.

Or just Buy it here.

If it's Friday, it must be Trampoline Accidents Day*! For some reason, and perhaps that reason is all the jumping, lack of sides, and shoddy construction, but trampolines are pain magnets. Everyone I've ever known who owned one has been injured on it. But the broken legs, concussions, and missing teeth aside, they sure are fun. Continue reading for a compilation of trampoline accident videos.

*Not to be confused with Tramp Accidents Day, which occurs next month.

Scaramouch mentioned boobs and bacon, but left out beer. Some things are priority.

According to Neatorama, Maryland are making registered sex offenders put a sign in their windows to make sure that children don't inadvertently knock on the door this Halloween and get a little more sugar than they bargained for.

Because Halloween is a holiday in which large numbers of children interact with strangers, the concern among parents and other community members about sexual offenders in their neighborhoods is naturally intensified during this time of year," Patrick McGee, interim director of the state’s Division of Parole and Probation, wrote in the Oct. 1 letter.

I can understand that, and I'm all for a system that protects children. But last year, I had the decidedly uncomfortable task of answering the door all night to young teenage girls who seemed to think they'd get the biggest grab bag if they dressed in the sluttiest costume they could find. It's an uncomfortable moment - you don't want to react, but somewhere there's that bad voice in your stomach that starts to giggle.
Fathers, I beg you - take note - DO NOT LET YOUR DAUGHTERS DRESS LIKE TARTS. Sheesh. Let's have a look at some of the worst examples I could find.

Sometimes it takes the ones who love you the most to tell you how you've strayed. Over the last few weeks, we are probably as guilty as the rest of the popular press of straying from our mission of entertainment and fun into political territory. But after comments here today, and last nights debate, our overwhelming urge is for it to all be over already. It was funny for awhile, but now it's just getting divisive.

So, we're declaring a moratorium. We've published our last political story until after the election. Time to get back to the boobs and bacon you all love. We urge everyone, when the time comes, to get out and vote, for whatever you believe in, but until then, no more Obama, McCain, Palin or the other guy.

Bring on the Streakers. But if you want to talk politics, use the forums.