My fellow Americans, what a whirlwind week it's been.
On Monday, most of us were just trying to make ends meet. But today, we've hit the mother load!
Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson just announced a program that will probably cost American taxpayers "hundreds of billions" of dollars. Turns out the government is buying bad mortgages and the toxic debt that has unhinged Wall Street this week.
But look on the bright side...
The good news is the American people have now achieved the impossible dream of becoming land barons and corporate titans! You and me are now part owners in loads of real estate as well as controlling interest in big banks and investment firms.
Sweet!
So what if it's all bad debt. I'm just so thrilled to own a few homes now. It's wonderful to know that my taxes, and yours, are going to such worthy causes as bailing out greedy, stupid MBA's and financial inept homeowners.
See you all at the annual stockholders meeting November 4th. Perhaps then we can sell it all to the Chinese and Europeans.
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Man we are Sooooooooo Screwed.
1. Remember the S&L bailout?
2. What the hell is a world wind?
E, world wind is the smell of the world's stock markets tanking.....kind of like a thousand frat boys all farting at the same time--into Bubble Boy's plastic little enclosure...
C'mon---you knew he meant whirlwind....
I know Im just busting his balls is all. Like that dude Joe Pesci killed and thew in the trunk in GoodFellas.
Fucking Baby Boomers...
Don't celebrate too much. All those houses are worth next to squat now. I should know -I own two of them, and it's not fun maintaining insurance on both.
No shit CLC, Why can't they have the good sense to die early like my grandparent did.
Just kidding.
Please don't feed me to the old people.....
(to clarify my earlier comment) - If you were driving around in a 450SL convertible Mercedes Benz, wearing a sweater with the sleeves tied around your neck (or a pink LaCoste shirt)and Top-Sider shoes, listening to Christopher Cross between 1980 and 1984, I'd like to speak with you. You guys planted some wealth-building seeds that have harvested economic devistation. The greed and blatant disregard our country's economic future is unreal (S&L scandals evolving from things like the popularity of Investment Properties). You slipped through the cracks when it became a bad thing to be called a "Yuppie", but at some point you, your lobbyist buddies (who in turn helped the shitty politicians that you relied on), will all have to pay the piper. Until then, my money is under a mattress.
Houses worth next to squat. What could be better. Knowing our awesome government, we'll sell them at a loss and give the new owners tax breaks!
Houses worth next to squat is not necessarily a bad thing if you're looking to buy one, no?
CLC - I'm a baby boomer Sun Devil. I can't believe you even talk to me.
Thankfully, I can claim that I am not guilty of a single one of your listed criteria for a CLC smackdown.
Tim - My father is a Baby Boomer and he's probably my best friend. I even gave him an ice pack after I hauled off and kicked him in his junk two days ago (He had the White 450SL...Peanut Butter interior...Chocolate brown top). He had it coming.
I'm really sorry if I offended you. Please accept my apology.
Everyone, pull whatever money you had in your pocket, count it, divide it by 3.
That is how much money you really have.
I'd like to thank all of those Taco Bell workers who are living in 300K houses. I'd also like to thank the wonderful banks that saw fit to loan money to any douche bag off the streets.
I would also like to thank the baby boomers, who within a couple of years through social security will suck the last of the milk from our borrowed tit , thus putting our economy somewhere below Russia's and above Ethiopia.
I would also like to thank any Seattle sports team that continues to exist. You will continue to provide laughs for all of us. Even in our poverty.
Scaramouch - Perhaps, but here's something to consider.
Banks and other investment institutions have been overwhelmed with liquidity issues; so much so that they haven't been able to go after many people with late mortgage payments because they can't carry the property (which can't be valued) on their books. Now that this is no longer a problem, watch the foreclosures start coming en masse.
For people that bought above their means, so be it. But for others that are having problems because of fuel prices and inflation, it's unfair because it really is the same temporary 'balance sheet' problem that the investment institutions had until yesterday. Now that those institutions are on firm ground, they may recoup previous losses by going after the little guy.
That's not good for any of us.
Tim, as a baby boomer, I hope you know that we love you.
That's why I come here ... it's all for the love, man.
This is why i still rent. The VA will guarantee me a home loan i can't pay for at any time, but i plan to be able to afford a house before i go buy one.
Hell I've never even owned a new car.
You know, I consider myself a socialist because I want nationalized health care, guaranteed food for the poor, nationalized transit system and utilities.
Guess what? We now have a nationalized high risk real estate system!! Fuuck, that's not what I had in mind, and it probably means we're going to have hungry poor people, and no health care.
I'm a Baby Boomer, but I'm guilty of nothing on your list. Well, maybe the Christopher Cross, but that was only because I was a radio announcer in the 80s. I still have 17 years to go before I can draw retirement (if I don't starve first).
Maybe if we're really screwed up beyond belief, the Chinese will not foreclose on the country after all? We owe them more money than anybody else, right? Seriously, I'm older than the Boomers, and I really never thought I would see in my lifetime the collapse of the safeguards enacted after the 1929 crash, the scorning and ignoring of the Constitution by the president and his administration, the promotion of torture and scoffing at the Geneva conventions... I could go on, but it makes me ill.
youguysarescaringme
so whats gonna happen when i get outta college in like four years, we talkin like grapes o wrath deeeeeeeeepression??
NJ2,
The effects of all this are really unknown at this point. The bad news, as far as I'm concerned, is that we are acting more and more like Russia every day.
The good news, since the government now owns assets with HUGE upside potential, and the means to control their performance, there is likely to be mega-bucks available in the U.S. Treasury for many years to come. Whether or not that translates into lower taxes, a smaller deficit and/or huge goverment programs remains to be seen. In theory, though, the Treasury should be very well off in the coming years.
Tim,
Unless the economy utterly collapses, leading to a broke government, which continues to sell assets overseas, or in country political instability.
I don't think that means losing an American democracy, but economic collapse and insolvent government checks lead to inflation, and this well, this leads to political collapse.
Still, political collapse isn't going to happen, we've got 230 years of democratic tradition, right? Its not like this could be worse than the Great Depression or the Long Depression, right?
This is what happens when the government starts deciding that a free people just can't take care of themselves.
If your elected officials had just kept their nose out of the free market (i.e: justifying their jobs) we wouldn't be going through this mess.
In the last decade or so, congress created huge incentives (they made an offer that couldn't be refused) for banks and mortgage firms to make these convoluted and exotic sub-prime loans:
"Well, you can't afford a mortgage now. But if we get you into an interest-only 3 year ARM, you can scrape by until the rate adjusts! And, you've got a whole three years to fix your credit and double your income! Then you can just refinance! How simple is that?"
Bang! Now EVERYONE can be a home-owner!
Then, here's where the fat cats really went and screwed things up:
"Now, lets bundle all these great new mortgages into garbage bonds and sell them on wall street. Investors needn't know what they're really comprised of. Lets just make an arbitrary risk scale and make MORE money! Remember, congress wanted us to make these loans, so how can we go wrong? Besides, there's no way the gubbament is gonna let us go under!"
And they were right. There's no way our gubbament is going to let us go into a depression because of their mistakes. They're mistake-proof. They'll just take it from the hard work of the taxpayers.
Phantom,
You forgot to list the biggest one of them all.
What, Enron failed? OK, well let's create all these ridiculous laws that force companies to waste thousands of man hours and spend millions of dollars to put values on assets that are meant to be variable anyway, and have no real value until maturity. If it sinks the small and midsize companies, so be it. If it gives overseas companies an unfair competitive advantage, so be it. Let's just force the legislation through because we simply cannot have another Enron.
Sarbanes-Oxley has just as much to do with this disaster as the rest. Enron was nothing compared to this. A disaster for Enron shareholders? Yes, but still nothing compared to all the shareholder losses involved in this latest debacle.