Citizens of Petaj Tikva, Israel watch out. Failing to curb your dog could land you in jail.
How?
The cops will analyze your Rovers DNA.
Dog crap is such a sticky, smelly issue in this suburb of Tel Aviv that people are voluntarily going to their local vet for this six month trial period, to get their pups DNA swabbed and put into the database.
Owners who scoop up their dogs' droppings and place them in specially marked bins will be eligible for rewards of pet food coupons and dog toys. But droppings found underfoot in the street and matched through the DNA database to a registered pet could earn its owner a municipal fine.
If successful this movement just might become mandatory. Boy that stinks.
But think how bad things must be in this town for this idea to actually be considered and put into practice.
In a related note, look for the dog DNA sniffers to appear on next season of World's Dirtiest Jobs.
Via Reuters
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Now this is why I keep coming back to YBNBY.
...which reminds me, where the hell is Jeni Gump?
Actually a good idea, if only it weren't for the Facist-esque registration and DNA-database, and the fact that the type of people who don't pick up their pets poo probably aren't the same people who register their pets.
this story's a load of shit.
sorry, couldn't resist.
Oh yeah B. Mike Rowe will be all over this like fat kids on chocolate
Well said CLC, so many shit around and she's missing...
This is a law that I can second. When I'm on my way to work and back home I pass through a side walk where is worse to walk than in a mine field. You can see from small samples to huge sofas of crap.
I think that a municipal fine is little, the motherfucker caught leaving the drops behind should be punished by collecting all the crap around his dog's pile. Bare hands. No glove. No paper.
If it was in front of my house, I'd pay millions, if needed, for someone to develop a shit-sensitive floor, and if after the crap fall, it stood there for more than 15 seconds, It would start the most noisy alarm shouting that that person was a dirty pig and holes in the wall and in the floor would start pouring water with cleaning products. With a fire truck hose pressure.
strathmeyer - may the leaver not be the owner and/or the person who registered the animal, but it's the owner's responsibility to take care of the crap. If he's paying someone to walk his dog, he has to make sure the guy will collect after the dog's work of art.
They're also kind of building up the DNA sample as a way to get info on the genetic codes of dogs, see if they are predisposed to diseases, etc.
And yeah Pablo, you're so right. It's pure shit.
As for Jeni, she pops in and out & will probably comment on this post in about 2 months along with all the others.
They should just hire some dude to walk around pouring bacon grease on the dog shit.
That way all of the dogs will clean up after each other.
That is a little trick I used in college. My neighbor's dog would shit on my lawn. So I would pour bacon grease on the shit.
The next time the dog would come to visit and shit he would eat his own shit from the day before. I told my neighbor about the bacon grease.
Pretty soon my neighbor would'nt let his dog come even close to my yard.
Case closed.
Damn Dave. Patent that idea, that's a winner.
A woman in the neighborhood is spraying chilli pepper on the side walk. She said that when the dogs start sniffing around they move fast forward because it hurts.
I don't believe it works with every dog, because I've used this tactic of spraying pepper before, in the doors in my old apartment, for my bull terrier to stop chewing the doors, but I think he yapped a 'thanks for seasoning the wood' when I arrived and the door was totalled.
I liked the bacon grease tactic. But I'd go upfront and add laxatives in the bacon grease, so the dog would arrive at his owner's home shitting all around as it went in.
Leo, that's why I like you. You have always end with an explosion.
The Gumpster has been gone for a while.
Baierman, that picture of the dog shitting is absolutely nausiating. I can almost smell the shit from my screen.
That's why I'm the arms seller...
I have so many plans I can't put to work... could be dangerous this, it's wrong that... you know this shit...
I don't quite understand. Wouldn't the DNA in dog poo be the genetic markers for what the dog ATE? It wouldn't surprise me if the genetic profile matched a cow or pig or ear of corn.
Leonardo Carvalho: The Brazilian Badass.
I can see the newbie cops getting this all screwed up.
'Go out their and analyze that!'
Officers Cheech and Chong go out there and examine.
'Looks like shit.'
'Smells like shit.'
...
- 'Tastes like.."
- 'Oh man... no joke... you did it??... Damn...'
Miss C.-
As the phecal matter exits the rectum, (no matter what the dog ate) it swabs the colorectal region similiar to a conventional swab to the mouth. Thus collecting millions of DNA particulates as it slowly exits.
The collection of DNA is evident by faint crackling sounds that can be heard as the combined phecal/dna "stink pickel" reacts with the atmospheric combination of Nitrogen and Oxygen.
This, in combination of the heat produced by the steaming "heater" causes the methane to react, destroying any possible DNA that could have been collected during injestion, only allowing the DNA of the creating animal to survive.
I hope that helps.
Dave you know your shit.
That's no shit.
Dave exposed all the shit about DNA collecting process.
[going to go hurl now]
Number one, you know you read that more than once.
Dave, it was actually your comment to Miss C. that finally pushed me to the porcelain.
Is is me or is Dog Shit the most repusive shit out there besides Human shit?
Can anyone think of a more repulsive shit?
Pigeon's shit!
Once you get hit, you can never stop hating those fuckers.
Pigeon is bad but what if it was dog shit that hit you?
Let me re-phrase this.
If someone forced you to take a bite of shit, what would be the absolute worse shit that a person could feed you?
I knew this post was going to turn completely to shit. Course, that's good news for our next curse-o-meter score.
Baier-
I'd like your input on what the most repulsive poo is?
You seem to be a poo authority.
The most repulsive poo? That's easy Dave.
George W. Bush.
Low blow Baier, Low Blow.
W is my Uncle.
If you were to run across a Pope's shit in the woods, and you ate it, would there be anyone there to see it?
Tim, that's a good question.
I think we could all agree that if we came across Jesse Jacksons duke, and ate it, everyone would see it, but the Pope now that is a totally different story.
What would taste worse, the Popes or Jesse Jackson's?
I think I would side with Jesse's being the nastier turd.
Damn, how did we get here?
worst shit? pig shit. ever drive by a pig farm? That smell will knock a buzzard off a gut wagon from a mile away.
Hey Leo! Pig Shit Mines. You're the arms dealer. Look into it would ya?
Yep Pablo... I've been on farms when I was a kid. Pig shit stinks like hell.
Have you heard about pig shit gas?
My brother was researching on this on High School. It was a Rural HS.
They gathered all the crap from the pig pens every day and stored on 200 litres containers, with a hose to exhaust the gas. Once they were playing around the containers and tried to light one of the hoses to see if the gas ignited. They just could be kidding, because that was pure methane.
They blew up one of the containers as the gas ignited... fireball and everything. Pig crap spread in a 60 meters radius. He and his friends stank for days.
BioFuel gang. Turn those lemons into lemonade!
Leo, i think we've found UNNA's first strike "Shock and Awe" weapon...
Hahahah... Chemical weapons! GWBush will come after to check and bomb me... hahaha
Think of a grenade, beer can sized, pressurized hog shit and gas, and an impact sensor to ignite the gas...
It would kill some and make the other guys kill themselves to get rid of the dirtiness and smell. Weapon of Mass Destruction.
If it doesn't destroy your body, it destroys your dignity. hahahahaha {insert Dr. Evil's laughter here}
i like the way you think leo...
MWAHAHAHA
Looking back, it's a shame I didn't go to the Army. I could have engaged in the weapon design and developing. We'd have the most amazing and unexpected weapons of the whole world.
Just think about a war in the desert. All of a sudden you find out a cooler filled with beer cans. And as you are thirsty, you want them. As you pull the ring to open it... BAM!!! Explosive pig's poo! hahahahah
I was dismissed when I enlisted. Here, you have the obligation to enlist, but it doesn't mean that you will serve in the military forces.
In the year that I enlisted -- you must do it when you turn 18 y.o. or you're declared as a deserter and lose your civil rights -- I was working already and there were too many people enlisting at the same time, so I was dismissed. Though in the case of a war I can be recruited.
But back then, I didn't want to serve, because I was earning more money from my job than the recruit's salary.
But look at what they missed. A brilliant weapons engineer.
Come to america leo.
DARPA has a place for you.
Hahahah... wish I could...
I need some engineering graduation first. Maybe we can make some money on "parallel market"... Who knows.