As the Balloonfest rolls on...There are two cardinal rules for political conventions. Rules that cannot be broken. Under any circumstances. The Dems broke two of them the other night.
1. Don't be boring and absolutely stink out the joint - What in the name of Nikola Telsa was Virginia Governor Mark Warner prattling on about? Car phones and cell phones and the ground floor of car phones and cell phones ... Is he done yet? Bloody hell. We haven't seen a speechwriting staff update their resumes this quickly since Howard Dean imploded in 2004.
B. Don't wear a bolo tie - That's right. Montana Governor Brain Schweitzer wore a bolo tie. Now I imagine this was a calculated decision among his staff to appear "folksy." Bad move. I don't know what Schweitzer was talking about. All I kept hearing was Wilford Brimley talk about having the "diabeetus."
We can't take anyone seriously that wears a bolo tie. Governor, you might as well have been wearing MC Hammer pants.
Goodnight and good luck.
JW
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I loved the bolo tie and I loved his speech. God I wish he'd given the nomination speech. Warner was horrible. He's sinking far and fast.
And Schweitzer, he's my new favorite Dem.
we have "cowboys" around here that wesr thos ties.... i didnt know what they were called. I want to pull on either string and choke them till they pass out
i really am a nice person
Well damn. I thought his bolo tie was completely acceptable because I just assumed that that's how people in Montana dress. Perhaps an unfair assumption (and in all fairness, I'm from Los Angeles - and I wear Birkenstocks whenever possible) but it was my stupid assumption no less. So does this mean that there isn't an overabundance of Mom Jeans in Alabama? Or Wranglers that hinder testicular blood circulation, that sell like hotcakes in Texas? I'm confused now.
We have some "rodeo cowboys" here who wear those nuts strangler Wranglers and sporting the hugest buckles they can afford to carry on their belts. Some of them also use the bolo ties and a Marlboro Guy hat.
I wonder why someone in his normals would wear MC Hammer's pants. That's scary as hell. Almost worse than mom jeans.
You know Schweitzer wears Hammer pants on Saturdays, mowing the lawn, or whatever you do on a lazy Montana Saturday
Now damn, I read this and find myself not only wearing a bolo tie but MC Hammer pants as well.
And what the hell is wrong with Montana??
And yeah the MC hammer pants are held up by a belt which is fastened by a Giant Belt buckle.
Bullshit Cliche's
All I can picture now is Dave strutting around the ranch with a bolo tie, Hammer pants and a huge ten gallon hat on. And Aqua Socks. Don't know where they came from.
wow Dave is hot
Isaac Asimov used to wear them. I thought it was a pleasant eccentricity/schtick. Not everyone can pull it off though.
Nice Dave. All you're missing now is a Gumby/Fade haircut, and you've officially punted yourself back into 1989 (the Tevin Campbell/Vanilla Ice look).
...and no one said anything was wrong with Montana. It would explain your Supersonics fetish :-)
I don't know where the Aqua socks came from either, but hey that's your fantasy and who am I to destroy your dreams.
Angie-Thank you, I know a couple of neighboring Ranchers that feel the same way. They call me "The Pretty Cowboy".
E-I don't even know who that guy is.
#1-A slight correction, I am currently sporting the Gumby/Fade doo.
I think it looks presidential.
"Do you think anyone wants a roundhouse to the head wearing pant's like these?
FORGET ABOUT IT!"
Quiz for a million bones: (What show was that from?)
http://us.rd.yahoo.com/dailynews/rss/politics/*http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080828/ap_on_el_pr/cvn_convention_rdp
Looks like Obama made the Yahoo news with some more brilliant policies.
are Aqua Socks an American thing?
E, Isaac Asimov wore Aqua Socks? Or bolo ties? Probably both. Bless his heart.
didn't Asimov wear Hammer pants too?
I think that's right Vader. I'm just going top off the outfit. I think he also wore a monocle, top hat, Nehru jacket and smoked a corn cob pipe. There, that should do it. R.I.P. Isaac.
pfffff napoleon dynamite, haha, good one.
yeah he did
now.... just lemme go update wikipedya real quick...
Johnny, now i have Frosty the Snowman in my head after reading about a corn cob pipe BOO
Angie if that is true, my job is done here today. I can clock out and head home.
And I don't know if Aqua Socks were only in the US. Maybe. They were a weird trend in the late 80's. A waterproof slip-on shoe from Nike.
Very good NJD.
I can't believe you are the only one that picked that up.
Ladies and Gentleman, Dr Isaac Asimov:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.tributetoasimov.com.ar/images/asimov_3.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.tributetoasimov.com.ar/&h=450&w=297&sz=35&hl=en&start=3&um=1&usg=__dlaFM2wuyKU6u5F0IIUOYorfL50=&tbnid=88lHtz7TS4vAJM:&tbnh=127&tbnw=84&prev=/images%3Fq%3Disaac%2Basimov%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1G1GGLQ_ENUS243%26sa%3DN
Sorry about the url.
Mutton chop side burns and bolo ties. YesButYes!
Here's a better url:
http://www.tributetoasimov.com.ar/
Those are Hall of Fame sideburns.
classic indie film,
well kinda.... at first at least
not lilke that shitty JUno movie, beurk...
sorry it took me, I threw my back out... douchebagery...
Well I do like the bolo ties. I'm a Cub Master and I do wear them. As for the artical he or she spelled diabetes wrong and I do believe they should have gone with 1 -2 or A-B in trying to make ones point.
Case in point...
1. Don't be boring and absolutely stink out the joint.....
B. Don't wear a bolo tie.....
My friend, both 1 followed by B and the spelling of diabetes as "diabeetus" are on purpose. Those are what we call jokes.
JW
Johnny, you my friend, just got taken to school.
Thank you Manofsound for putting this fool in his place and helping him with his writing.
We need a man of your caliber here to help us all out.
I do need some pointers with the irony and the smarty-pants quips.
J dub, I hate for you to have to settle into a weekend with that type of burn, but you asked for it with your sloppy English damnit.
Keep your head up.
I hope that Manofsound will stick around to help polish all of our skills.
I'm okay. *deep breath* I'm okay...
I don't give virtual hugs very often but here you go.
*HUG*
That was kind of gay, and I felt dirty for doing it. I'll never do that again.
Hello John Wright, Great name…everyone needs a John.
Well let us get on with it. I am sorry I don’t know your sense of humor. You had me on 1 and b. However, on the “Diabeetus” I saw that one but I didn’t think it was funny. If you would had read my profile I stated I hold a Chair for JDRF (Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation). Reason, my 9 year old son came down with diabetes when he was 3. After my wife and I stopped crying, we decided to do something about it. Therefore, I hold a Chair for the First Aide Tent on walk day. As for jokes, I love jokes…
Confucius says, He who farts in church, sits in own pew.
What do you call a twelve-inch mushroom? Fungi
OK, sorry about the jokes
I did leave you with a typo (article) - should’ve been article.
Now I must go my son and I have a date w/ Publix. We are selling popcorn for cub scouts “Boy Howdy.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjZwNTLh4_U&feature=related
Johnny, You Sir Are The Bottom of A Bird Cage!!!!!
My point is that it was a Wilford Brimley joke, not a diabetes joke. He says the word funny. I am not making light of diabetes in any way. It was a Wilford Brimley gag that flew over your head. In no way was I mocking your son or anyone that has diabetes.
Good hell...
Oh I get it Johnny. But you still don't get it. Any joke with diabetes is not funny. I check my son several times a day and at night around 1:00am so he doesn't get to low. He also takes 3-4 shots of insulin a day. I just don't like your since of humor. I suggest going to a JDRF support group and get first hand on how to deal with JD.
Typo ( Aid) not Aide.
Thanks Dave for the virtual.. I'll take it. Just don't tell my wife.
OK, I have to jump in here with a few remarks ...
1) What kind of man steals a hug meant for another man?
b) The bottom of the Bird Cage is pretty cool. There are a lot of things preserved from the days when Wyatt Earp was around. I highly recommend a trip there. Would might living there myself ... if Johnny will have me.
~) I'm still looking for the diabetes joke here that Johnny is getting raked for. Wilford Brimley, on the other hand, is funny. Every time he talks I feel ashamed to be alive.
Hey Tim, Cool picture....anyway I thought the hug was for me. Damn!!! Ain't That A Whoopin.
My wife and I been in Tombstone Arizona. I found out they have tunnels under Tombstone because of mining for silver. About 20-30 miles up is a town called Bisbee. It's known for the Copper Queen Mine. Around the 70's the mine closed. People was selling their house for next to nothing . They do give tours down into the mine. A foreign gentleman bought the boarding house that the miners lived in and he turned it into a Bed & Breakfast. We stayed in Bisbee for three nights. Then we traveled to Vegas and we came home with about $4,000. What a great vacation.
As for not understanding the diabetes joke their isn't one.
Manosfound, I won't even enter in the whole conversation, it's like loosing my time.
Just would like to ask you if you have sense of humour, and where do you leave it before coming into a humorous website. If you had some you'd note the joke was about the accented pronunciation. Oh no, you have sense of humour, you wear bolo ties, right? You just can be joking us. D'you wear MC Hammer pants too?
J-Dub, I think you'd better use something like this: [sarcasm on] {insert joke here} [sarcasm off] when posting something that a guy wearing bolo ties would read. You know, the tie prevents the blood from reaching the brain, causing lack of humour and timing for jokes.
See, this is where the choice of my name comes in handy...it makes you assume that everything I say is sarcastic (although unfortunate when I'm posting on something serious like the poor dead infant with two heads, or even the movie trailer guy's obit).
And today I posted about poor grammar without having read this whole thread...JW--it wasn't a comment about you!
Yo!! Leon ........!!!!!!WHATZ UP!!!!!
I don’t give a flying finger if “diabeetus” was in a joking form. It hits close to home. If or when you have kids, if they developed diabetes, you may feel different about this. As for the MC Hammer paints yes I do wear them like you wear a Bra!!!
Man, you should take it easy sometimes.
My daughter, thanks God, has no illnesses, but I have relatives and friends who have/had hard times with diabetes (one of them lost a leg because of the diabetes), and even with that I understood the context of the diabetes in the post.
You look like what we call here "post parachutist". People who come to a blog following a google link about the terms you were searching for, read the text without trying to get the context of the post or the blog/site, and start attacking.
If you were used to sense of humour, would not be so concerned about the 1./b. on the list.
Sorry about the McHammer pants... but how did you know about my bras? I thought it was a secret.
I'm sorry, really, not sarcastic, about your son's diabetes problem. I never meant to joke about it, and never will with anyone. And deeply in my heart I hope that he gets better in his fight against the ill, it's really not funny.
But you should relax a little, man.
The whole post had nothing to do with making fun with diabetic people. I can assure you.
Leo,
Don't worry....look at his post times...for someone who had some quality time to spend with his kid, he sure was in a hurry to get back to us....
Could someone please post the original commercial that JW was referencing?
my grandmother died after going into a diabetic coma and I still get that Johnny was only making fun of Wilfred's accent....geez...
And MoS....please take a quick look at our forums and catch up on the Rules...Scaramouch or Echowood will be happy to ring up your purchases...
Manofsound, if I didn't feel dirty for giving my last virtual hug, I would give you one too, I also might move my hips a hump your leg to see if I could get you to smile.
I understand the seriousness of diabetes, a couple of weeks ago I nearly watched a good friend die of ketoacidosis, which was not funny.
I also understand that we have to be aware of the not-seriousness of YBNBY. I don't think anyone here would intentionally say anything to lighten the seriousnes of diabetes , in fact, I think if you knew Johnny, you would know that Johnny would give his left nut if it would mean that your boy could be cured of diabetes, I think any of us would.
So, be happy and smile more, and don't take any of this personal, or we might put you into Douche bag status with Chad.
JW--six words into MoS's profile he has a major typo....
A post I understand.... but your profile should be re-read before hitting send...after all, there is a big difference between "have to sons" and "have two sons"....
If your profile is long and detailed and traumatic to write about (your lost childhood, for example), a typo is forgiven.
If you are bi-lingual and have an occasional typo, we absolutely forgive that--esp if you sound more intelligent than some of the ranters who pop up and disappear around here....
I personally have one in one of my rules...but saw it as I hit send...oh well....
Once you progress beyond occasional typos to committing them on a regular basis, we upgrade you to a member of the writing team. Thomas' column should be starting shortly.
that soundz lik grate fun, mistur contriductor!!!
(wow--it's hard to sound dumb--maybe he should get a job!)
btw, no kudos for trying to sell stuff for you? a sense of humor sale is an easy download--no shipping and handling to have to worry about....
I can't wait for Thomas' first column.
"Leonardo mexicun wers bra - Mnosfund tood me that. But mnosfnde too cant takl boolsht becuz he wers boloteis and mchameers paint" -- maybe a guess.
s.o. -- I appreciate that you forgive me. Thanks! ;)
Hello Leonardo & Friends,
Thank you all for understanding and I’m sorry for all of your lose to family and friends do to diabetes. If you’re interested in some information about a cure for type 1 diabetes, look up Dr. Henry Daniell at UCF. He is scientist who developed the vaccine for Anthrax. Somehow he tweak the genes and made a cure for type 1 diabetes. When I get a chance, I will give you a link to his website. I meet with him last year at UCF.
I guess I can call you people my personal Jock Strap now.
Thanks, Outhouse I meant John
i no wat yoo sa leo.
i no i leved case i mad butt i no taht gi namd manosond.
he wass mi cubmsstr.
he tuch me on mi bumm an sa kepe secrit tommy kepe secrit.
i kepe secrit til todae.
dam yoo manfsond. dam yo fr tuchin mi bumm.
perrvrt.
i leve now.
assl.
leo, sa hi too yor mom.
mmmmmmmmmmmm leo mom mmmmmmm.
Hi Thomas,
I don't think we have been introduced.
How are you buddy?
Hey Little Tommy,
I saw that your sister wrote your B O for ya.
I bet your a Proctologist !!! cause your a pain in my ASS!!!
sahitoyasis
dave no rill dave dav si ded.
monosond tht funne yoo sa i pane in yor as s
yor momm sed i pane in hr ass too wen i giv hr mi jonson.
oh tommy oh manosod momm oh tomme o manosod momm.
yo don lreddy tommy.
ye i dun go hom hor.
hahahahahahahaha
brn
YO Tom Tom,
I bet your realy a gay bear.... cause you laid your pa on the table!!
sht4brains
Bro. I think you are mistaken.
I just went on vacation. I am alive and well.
At least I think I am.
Tommy boy, how could you do that to may mom? I thought you were dating for real, and now your hanging with manosound's ma too?
Shell be upset as soon as she gets to know it.
Manofsound... relax man. No big deal. We're not as evil as we look (or maybe we are).
Dave...let them duke it out amongst themselves....it's kind of like watching Darwinism in real time...
Leo--that didn't include you...
Sounds great, s.o., let's Darwin prove he's right.
Ooops... ;)
Ok Leonardo, I'm sorry man.
I need to go now. I have lots of meetings to go to.
Yeah, I think I'll let them duke it out. I've got 20 bucks on Tommy.
Damn, too late.
Manofsound already busted.
ho yor dady yo ar tommy yo ar.
Dave, he's not really gone--probably just lurking...he has a habit of doing that...but he is an important man...so many meetings....
Is that what the Cub Scout masters are calling it these days?
I don't know what they call it now days.
I think I've lost my edge.
I didn't even feel like calling that guy a douche bag.
I think somebody slipped me a ruffie.
the word loses its effectiveness if you hand it out to everyone....keep the power, use it sparingly....
I think a good old fashioned challenge would cheer you up....
But it is only Monday---ease back into it Dave....
That's true, the word does lose effectiveness if not properly placed.
Sometimes it doesn't need to be placed.
It's hunting season. My IQ dropped about 75 points. It's an annual thing.
Is that because you sympathize with the wolves, or because you're a hunter?
Both.
Now I know to be on better behavior since you're armed....thanks for the heads up!
Hello Good People,
Here is a viedo on Dr. Henry Daniell cure for type 1 diabetes.
http://abclocal.go.com/kabc/story?section=news/health&id=6302100