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Creepiest. Funeral. Ever.
wake-hmed-840a.hmedium.jpgIt appears a deceased Puerto Rican man really loved Weekend at Bernie's.

24-year-old Angel Pantoja Medina was found dead last week underneath a bridge in San Juan. Apparently Angel had expressed a desire to be propped up and "stand" for his own funeral. His family wished to respect his wishes. So the local funeral home used a "special embalming treatment" so the dead Angel could "stand" next to his coffin during the wake. During a three day wake.

Yep, for three days, a dead guy "stood" in his mothers house while friends and relatives came by to pay their respects. Some mourners even kissed the stiff.

Good heavens...

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58 Comments

Even more amazing is that a 24 year old actually had the presence of mind to prepare for his own untimely death.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 8:41 AM.

I didn't understand that either. I'm not discounting that this is a well executed hoax.

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 8:49 AM.

What the hell? Man, I wouldn't like to attend to his wake. Creepy!

He must have been Koloniak's friend. Have you noticed his cap?

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 9:10 AM.

It wouldn't be a tremdous shock if it were a hoax. A little media attention seems to pay well these days. It worked for the meth heads in that Big Foot scam last week.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 9:11 AM.

LC - That was the first thing I noticed. I thought it was the work of your team so I wasn't gonna say anything. Don't want to bring too much exposure your way.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 9:16 AM.

Leo is still in the doghouse for calling me a turd in the toilet bowl, but he's right about this funeral. I would not go to that wake for all the monkeys in India. Freaking me out.

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 9:24 AM.

Reverend - I don't think Leonardo meant to call you a turd... you're what I'd consider "colateral damage".

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 9:27 AM.

Semantics aside, Leo is still on Loyal 77 probation.

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 9:35 AM.

Their friend may be dead but they are still blinging!

said Bigus Dickus on August 20, 2008 9:55 AM.

Angel's last stand.

RIMSHOT!

said Elkabong on August 20, 2008 9:56 AM.

Ba dum ching!

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 10:02 AM.

He was a real stand up kid.

said Dan on August 20, 2008 10:09 AM.

I can't stand funerals.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 10:10 AM.

Dead Man Walking

said Tim on August 20, 2008 10:15 AM.

So will his killers stand trial?

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 10:29 AM.

Rev-If you are going to put Leo loyal 77 probation, you might as well put me on the list as well.
I stand with my Team.
For some reason, I thought you were part of the team. Are you part of team America or are you part of team New York?
You know the rules. You are either with us or against us and if you are against us, we send a pack of militant Brazillians to bring me back your balls on a sharpened stick.
Think about it. We love you and want to continue loving you.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 10:34 AM.

Mr Reverend... as CLC said, you're into the sad losses we need to have when a cleaning job comes to get the town rid of the crap like Kolon-eek.

When my flushing boys arrive to wipe out the shit from NYC, I'll let you know in advance, so you can have a call to some friends you might want them to be with you for a week or two outside NYC.

Can I step out the dog's house now? Those damn fleas are eating me alive!

CLC - that was an advice to Klonk... His dealer was the first one to go...

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 10:36 AM.

Sorry to break the clever comment chain, lets continue-

I just can't stand fighting amongst the team.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 10:39 AM.

Dave. Way to take a stand.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 10:47 AM.

Leo is now off probation. I think he's thought about what he did. I'm tough but I'm fair.

Carry on.

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 10:48 AM.

I don't think the Reverend is against us... He's a reasonable man.

Dave, I've heard from my guys that there's a set of Russian Balls flying your way. They're going to deliver it to you in a day or two. Would you like to cut 'em off yourself? I can arrange it.

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 10:48 AM.

If the killers stand trial, I bet they get the chair.

said Tim on August 20, 2008 10:49 AM.

Reverend - thanks for taking Leo off probabion. He's an upstanding member of this team, and certainly meant no harm.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 10:51 AM.

Angel's girlfriend thought she'd been stood up, until she learned of her boyfriend's demise.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 10:54 AM.

No harm at all... But still I'm sorry I hadn't been clear enough.

Do you know what his mother said when they finally put him into the coffin?
"Just in time... I couldn't stand that anymore."

Wakka wakka wakka

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 10:55 AM.

(...)
Oh darling, darling
Stand by me
Oh won't you stand by me
(...)

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 11:00 AM.

The only thing that stood between Angel and his Lord, was a bullet.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 11:08 AM.

J-Dub,
I appreciate taking one for the team. You are tough but fair.
You are the superglue that holds the team together.
For your kindness I give you a standing ovation.

Leo,
Please have your men detatch the nuts before arrival. I repeat detach the nuts before arrival. I prefer only touching my nuts not some stinky russian nuts. Hence the sharpened stick.
Thanks buddy.
Perhaps we will celebrate with a keg stand.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 11:08 AM.

Some posts are natural born Caption Competitions.

This guy's post stands on the top of those.

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 11:10 AM.

I have a 5 liters Heineken keg standing on the fridge... Wanna join?

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 11:15 AM.

I love how the deceased still has his sunglasses on. Indoors and dead, still needs his shades.

And Leo, I think this bump in the road has made the Loyal 77 stronger. Like the tempering of a fine sword.

JW

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 11:16 AM.

Dave - I thought you were gonna hand down Jesse's Law the old-fashioned way. I stand corrected.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 11:18 AM.

Man, thats just messed up. Remind me not to party with these guys.

said E on August 20, 2008 11:19 AM.

E - Angel would probably still been alive if someone would have stood up for him.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 11:21 AM.

OH THE FUCKING SHAME!!!! *looks for a seppuku sword*


It had to be some asshole projects living gangbanger from the island that came up with this thing. I heard about this about 2 days ago when it was on the news, of course i thought "what the hell were they thinking?" Dude was shot 3 or 4 times in the back.

said etantao on August 20, 2008 11:22 AM.

I stand corrected, Johnny you are not only the super glue that holds the team together you are flame that tempers our swords.

"The flame that tempers our swords", just didn't sound right.

Sorry, I'll go stand in the corner.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 11:22 AM.

10 minutes Dave. I'll set the egg timer.

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 11:26 AM.

(off the 'stand' subject) - Did anyone else realize Angel is bring "Funky Cold Medina" back?

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 11:31 AM.

Perhaps the sign below him explains the situation:

Before I died I found a potion:
So I gave some to my dog, when he began to beg
and then he licked his bowl and he looked at me
and did the wild thing on my leg
he used to scratch and bite me
before he was much much meaner
but now all the poodles run to my house for the funky cold medina

you know what I'm saying
I don't wanna be layin down cuz the dog
might funk my cold medina.

You never know.

said Dave on August 20, 2008 11:46 AM.

"I love how the deceased still has his sunglasses on. Indoors and dead, still needs his shades."

Uhh (yuck). Well, your eyes liquefy after death. So either he's gonna be standing there with his eyes closed, or they're gonna put some marbles in the sockets, or he sports the shades. It's more gangsta anyway.

said E on August 20, 2008 11:47 AM.

Thanks JW. It's an honor to be in the Loyal 77. And the bumps are on our roads to strengthen our ties!

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 12:04 PM.

That they do, that they do...

said Johnny Wright on August 20, 2008 12:08 PM.

I like how they said he was found dead under a bridge. Couple questions come to mind - what exactly happened that he died under a bridge. If they had really wanted to do him a favor they should have tried to keep that from happening in the first place. Kids these days....

said E on August 20, 2008 12:17 PM.

Just looking at him and hi brother, you may have an idea of how he was found under the bridge. Just need the number of bullets and the places they were found to detail the history.
Uh, of course, and need more investigations to assure if it was an act of rivalry or "shut you mouth, you say too much".

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 12:52 PM.

Now Angel stands cornered while his mother asks why did he chose this life.

said Leonardo Carvalho on August 20, 2008 12:54 PM.

What constitutes "special embalming treatment" in order for Funky Cold Mr. Medina to "stand"? Outside of impalement, what other options are there? Lean him in the corner? Velcro his Nikes to the carpet? I'm curious to know how they stood him up.

said ConservaLiberCrat_08 on August 20, 2008 1:31 PM.

i like his moms shirt, heheheheheh. he's kinda lookin reflectively off into the sky, they should put him near a window, he'd be the best son evar!

said notjohndoe2 on August 20, 2008 1:49 PM.

CLC -

It is my understanding that if you fill the circulatory system with Superglue it will harden into a rigid infrastructure. Unlike bones, which require muscles and ligaments to hold them together into a skeleton, the circulatory system can stand on its own.

Tim

said Tim on August 20, 2008 4:01 PM.

CLC: the main local newspaper said there wasn't any "special embalming treatment" just a normal one. and it said the was help up but some stand/hooks.

said etantao on August 20, 2008 11:18 PM.

Elton said it best:

You could never know what it's like
Your blood like winter freezes just like ice
And there's a cold lonely light that shines from you
You'll wind up like the wreck you hide behind that mask you use

And did you think this fool could never win
Well look at me, I'm coming back again
I got a taste of love in a simple way
And if you need to know while I'm still standing you just fade away

Don't you know I'm still standing better than I ever did
Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid
I'm still standing after all this time
Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind

I'm still standing yeah yeah yeah
I'm still standing yeah yeah yeah

Once I never could hope to win
You starting down the road leaving me again
The threats you made were meant to cut me down
And if our love was just a circus you'd be a clown by now

said Jeni Gump on August 21, 2008 2:32 PM.

YOU MOTHER FUCKERS...HOW FUCKING DARE YOU MAKE FUN OF THIS TRAGEDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES, IT IS VERY INTRIGUING BUT THIS VERY YOUNG MAN IS STILL DEAD YOU BITCHES. I JUST WANT TO SAY, WOULD IT BE FUNNY IF IT WERE YOUR DEAD FAMILY MEMBER....REGARDLESS OF THEIR STRANGE WISH. SO TO ALL YOU FUCKS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA ON YOUR SHIT IF IT WERE YA'LL. DAMN THATS NOT FUNNY ANYMORE IS IT BITCHES??????????!!!!!!!

said kelly on September 6, 2008 7:52 PM.

Though difficult to refute such an articulate and upper-cased argument, I thought about this. And yes, it's still funny.

said Johnny Wright on September 6, 2008 8:00 PM.

Yes--
But No--
But Yes

said sarcastic one on September 6, 2008 8:45 PM.

Johnny Wright. Representin'.

said Tim on September 6, 2008 8:51 PM.

JW--I admire you for standing up for your beliefs.....

said sarcastic one on September 6, 2008 9:00 PM.

Thank you. I appreciate that.

said Johnny Wright on September 6, 2008 9:29 PM.

Hey JW, you're gonna have to reset the "days without a douchebag comment" counter. What was the record?

How come these people come around here to comment such subject? I wonder what was she searching for at google.

said Leonardo Carvalho on September 6, 2008 10:37 PM.

We almost made 77 hours. I'll reset the counter and we'll try again.

said Johnny Wright on September 6, 2008 10:47 PM.
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