Apologies for my sparce posting of late. I have just gotten back from two weeks on the road, and I've a mountain of email to wade through, including some cool prizes for a competition later in the week, plus a few submitted stories to follow up on. But in the meantime, here's a quickie - a bizarre picture for a Caption Competition submitted by reader Teresa.
Oh those wacky Japanese. Captions, as always, in comments :)
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I don't.....I Just........Huh? Seriously....What the hell?
'Listen, don't let being on dialysis keep you from making the Furry Porn movie of your dreams.'
I'd love to know how this guy answers the question 'What's my motivation here?'
'Sesame Street has a slightly different vibe in Japan.'
Long Duck Dong: SHUT UP!! He said he'd be here at 3 o'clock!
Soo Chen: Long, I really don't think there's such a thing as leprechauns.
it looks so funny, but its just too weird. i got nothing.
'He's a banana slug, she's a catatonic school girl. Together they fight crime.'
'That's how people are in Japan. Just try to fit in ok?'
Long Duck Dong: Okay Soo. Stay veeeeeery still. Those silly Americans will NEVER learn the truth with this Anti-AVU serum!
Long Duck Dong: "Soo! I said don't move!! Dammit! Do you want to end up this idiot behind me??"
'You know this stuff always makes sense until the drugs wear off.'
Would you like to touch my monkey?
'Damn that David Lynch. His movies are always like this.'
Abortion can be made into a fun disney movie.
'You know what it is about Japan? It's the little differences. The stuff you barely notice.'
Another typical day in Japan.
E - Your on a roll today, bud. You'll be tough to top.
I gotta think on this one awhile. It's just too bizarre.
Thanks Tim. Just remember, I'm sure this all made sense in context.
Dr. Sakato Umamura presents the revolutionary ass cricket removal machine. As you can see in the screen, her ass is clean now.
Behind him a magnified sample of the Japanese strand of the ass-crickets.
Possible context: 'Hey, we're all really high, let's do something different tonight.' Next thing you know you're wearing a giant banana slug outfit.
Prince and The Revolution - in Japanese.
"I wonder if we can win a medal for this!"
A trio of Japanese performance artists re-enact the meeting at which the Bush Administration planned their post-invasion strategy for Iraq. (From left to right, Condoleeza Rice, George W. Bush, and Paul Wolfowitz.)
An obvious retelling of alice in wonderland set in a library and replacing the hookah smoking caterpillar with girl with hose and
a babychick alien instead of the cheshire cat. mushrooms are legal in japan as long as they're dry ya know..
Where Are They Now: Japan's first test tube baby.
Alas, we finally get to learn which came first. The chicken or the egg.
RUCK BE RADY TONIGHT, POPPY NEED NEW FRUKES COMPACTOR!!!!
[mekon12, please save me a seat in hell]
i knew this was the right place to send this picture. when i found it, i stared at it in confusion for 5 whole minutes before i even realized "hey, hot japanese school girl." that's saying a lot. thank you everyone!
~Teresa
mobudaki - Thank you I won't be able to sleep tonight. hahahah
PSPorn. The new next-gen console for the freak in all of us.
Teresa - you left off a very important part...
"Hey, hot japanese school girl with a GIANT FUCKING TUBE STICKING OUT OF HER BELLY BUTTON... and some wierd "Martin Short-esque" dude in BOY SHORTS, with Big Bird and Snuffleupagus' fucking LOVE CHILD in the background - and the whole scene looks like the fucking 'Black Hole Sun' video!"
MY HEAD IS KILLING ME!!
Does this bird suit make me look fat?
"A preview of the 2008 closing ceremony seen here..."
A stunning example of Internet Rule 39.
These are villains in the new James Bond film, right?
Ms. Bellybutton, Dr. Pray A Lot and the evil henchman Fuzzy McWhat-the-fuck?
I'm getting a hailstorm of thoughts involving Pokemon, blow up dolls and Pee Wee Herman....
"After Cowboy Curtis left the Playhouse to have a real career, Pee Wee decided to combine his loves of Pokemon, blow up dolls, and fuzzy nipples and prayed for a career comeback"
i still got nothing, what possible context could this have? how about
Soon my evil army of furry banana-slug-penis-looking people will take over the earth.
Seriously though WTF is wrong with japanese people?
Anyone notice that the Japanese schoolgirl is in almost the same pose as Phoebe Cates in the ad just to the right of the caption picture?
Sarcastic One: very nice combination.
As soon as it premiered, Hiroyuki knew that his new show, “Teletubbies Action Heroes” hadn't translated well to the Japanese television audience.
In the latest scandal to rock PBS television, it has been revealed that 'Tubby Custard' is nothing more than placenta extract obtained from the womb of Japanese schoolgirls.
Although she knew that there was big money to be made in Japanese TV commercials, Danica McKellar realized as soon as shooting began that this commercial could have appeal in the States as well.
'Hideki, Hideki: A Young Schoolgirl's Journey from Kyoto to Yokohama' is expected to be the first international studio release for L'il Jimmy Productions, LLC.
Howard the (Geo)Duck II, Electric BoogaLoo.
Hmm. To me it looks like they are in the middle of making a movie on the dangers of home liposuction and reading too much Dr Suess - at the same time. The whole thing directed by the Japanes Beau Brummel.
Yep. Makes perfect sense now.
Recent Tokyo University graduates Suriyumi Numi, George Takei, Jr. and Hiriuoku the Banana Monkey attempt to explain to Emperor Akihito the concept of thinking 'outside the box'.
'wtf'
This picture is from the great movie Funky Forest: The First Contact !! I love that movie ! So bizar and funny, you will never see anything like it.
How Austin Powers was really conceived
I think I am finally scarred for life now. This gives me the icky icky ooo feeling more than the Mini Me Sex Tape Clip!
Thanks YBNBY!
Hello Reidou.
Hello Daifu.
We-are-high-on...
Yakubutsu.
New-pals-are-sex-fiends...
They're-on-Codeine...
...and-our-leader-says-that-I'm-his-yellow-Play Thing!
"Kill Bill - Vol. 3"
I got nothing... to fucking bizarre, I'll come back to this one.
"2 Girls 1 Cup Aint got nothing on me!"
Umm...Professor Ito, I could be wrong, but I'm not sure this is what they had in mind when they asked you to "connect with the student body."
Ha! And they said I would never make it as a door to door colonic salesman!
This is what happens when we let Anne Woods and Andrew Davenport try to make porn.
See...its always the case! Live action versions of anime are never as interesting as the original!