Here's why. I can't stand rooting for individual players and not teams. I can't trick myself into doing it. It feels wrong to me to hope that the Anaheim Angels lose every game but also hope that Vladimir Guererro had 4 RBI's and a dinger. Emphasis on individual numbers is one of the major problems in modern day athletics. We have guys like Stephon Marbury, who has never helped a team become a winner, but says, "I got 20 and 10, what more do you want?" Well, the Knick fans would like a few more W's there Starbury. There is too much "I" and not enough "we" in team sports today. Way too much. We need more guys like Walter Payton, Magic Johnson and Cal Ripken. We have enough of the Vince Carter's and Terrell Owens's.

Some of my buddies are full-on addicts. They Jones for fantasy football every year. Then during the football season, they seem to space all important information that doesn't pertain to their fantasy squad. They'll tell you how many rushing yards Ladainian Tomlinson had the last three Sundays. Quick, when is your wife's birthday? "Uh ... the spring?"

Every major sport and most minor ones have online fantasy leagues. There are fantasy fishing leagues. Seriously. There's also a fantasy Congress league (how that works, I have no idea) and even, I can't believe I'm going to type this, fantasy professional wrestling leagues. Has there ever been a bigger oxymoron than that? It makes less sense than jumbo shrimp, idiot savant or kosher ham. (Or, me writing a column for a woman's fashion magazine. Strangely, that is true.) If you are playing fantasy professional wrestling, it is time to reevaluate your life.

These would be my real fantasies in sports.

That baseball wouldn't be riddled with steroids and cheaters, the biggest of whom shamefully broke a very hallowed record.

That basketball would move away from the tedious isolation plays and pick and rolls. Can we please watch how the game was played during the 80's and early 90's and at least try to get back to that? It would also be nice if the players could actually make jumpshots and not be so concerned about alley-oops.

That college football would have a playoff system and not rely on an outdated, horrible system full of conjecture and politics that has more in common with figure skating than football. We vote on who is the national champion? Come on.

That we would hear less about the police blotter on Sportscenter and more about the actual games.

And that all major sports would get spending under control and not let snake-oil salesman agents hold franchises hostage to overpay overrated "stars" that are more concerned about individual stats than wins and losses.

Now those are fantasies.

Selah.