Chris Hansen, you have a call on line one...
Classy Daniel Allen Everett went to have sex with a girl he believed to be 14-years-old. Nope. Those are cops.
When planning his date, Dan thought it would be wise to wear his best 'World's Greatest Dad' t-shirt. Of course, you want the girl to feel you're a good guy. That shirt should put her at ease. They don't give those out to just any dad. Only those that have earned them.
Daniel's bail was set at 50 large.
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There should be no bail for this kind of crap. A guy who molests kids, or even try to, deserves to rot in the worst jail ever imagined. Or they could be hanged upside-down tied by the nuts. That's better...
Here in Brazil when the cops arrest a child molester, they put him in a overpopulated cell and tell all the other prisoners what he was caught for.
Taaa-daaaa... Here comes the new bitch!
Also, in the nasty list of the 'criminal good behavior code' comes rapers, people who assault elders, wife-spanker and last but not least, the informers (here we call them X-9, guess it's because the comic's character Secret Agent X-9).
Classy, indeed. In addition, I'd say from the typeface of the "W" on his shirt, Mr. Everett was awarded his title by none other than the World Wrestling Entertainment organization, a double-classy distinction. I believe Hulk Hogan himself was the only other recipient of that coveted shirt!
Yeah, the Hulksters kids have no problems at all.
Reverend Wright, I think now would be a good time to test your castration skills. Show Jesse how's it's really done.
That seems like a somewhat subjective award. What are the scoring criteria?
Where's my scalpel? Has to around here somewhere...
See? I knew you'd be the right man for it. Jesse was ready to yank and tug on them. A scalpel?? Man, that's classy. I was thinking of something along the lines of some string, a bumper, and a full tank of gas. But I guess that's why they pay you the big bucks!
That is true, my son...
From the Houston Daily-
"When asked by investigators about his choice of clothing, Mr. Everett responded, "My 'I heart young pussy' t-shirt was dirty."
I hope he's sodomized by a Mr. T lookalike on an hourly basis.
... I pitty the foo ...