I smell injustice Steel! I smell hypocrisy.
There has been some fallout after Shaq Diesel's "freestyle" and "impromptu" rap performance at a New York City night club earlier this week.
(If you think "Kobe, tell me how my a** tastes" was off the cuff, you're really naive.)
Since the debacle, Shaquille has been asked to return some of his honorary deputy badges.
Give me a break.
In recent years, Shaq has devoted some of his spare time to helping law enforcement in Virginia, Phoenix and Miami. No longer.
First, nut-bar Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio asks for Shaq to turn in his badge for the use of foul language. Bear in mind that Joe is the same guy who makes his prisoners wear pink underwear in an effort to emasculate them. That'll show these crooks Joe. Good thinking. Pink underwear. No riots after that. The pedophiles and murderers will straighten up and fly right now.
Now Bedford County Sheriff Mike Brown has asked The Big Aristotle to turn in his badge that he was issued for his help on the Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force. The reason? Again, naughty language.
Of course, we all know that police officers do not say bad words. Ever. They use words like "fudge" and "sugar" in place of vulgarity. So this makes sense.
I overheard a cop say "Judas Priest!" once. I looked at him He looked at me. Knowing he was busted, he hung his head, took out his Beretta and badge and handed them over. It was a legendary citizen's arrest. Officer Rauch apologized and shook my hand. After a six month suspension and court ordered language modification classes, he returned to duty. Officer Rauch never forgot the lesson he learned that day.
Why would you allow a professional athlete to volunteer time to help law enforcement when they use such language? It cannot be done. Especially when you have such an abundance of narcissistic athletes lining up to volunteer their time. They must be turning them away in droves.
If all this wasn't stupid enough, these aren't real badges! They are "honorary." There isn't much difference from those, and the tin stars with "Kenny" on them you can buy at the Alcatraz gift shop. Like Dwight Shrute's volunteer deputy uniform, it's Halloween.
Well done, Sheriff. Keep these celebrities in check.
"Badges? We ain't got no badges! We don't need no badges! I don't have to show you any stinking badges!"
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i hope the people from those counties are happy with where their tax dollars are going and the efforts of their police departments.
In the words of George Costanza, "It's like an onion, the more you peel it, the more it stinks."
I have no problem with the language, but if he was pretending to freestyle and actually had it all planned out - that's a rappers violation and he should be suitably chastised.
Then again, I'll let him off the hook cause sticking it to Kobe is appropriate however you do it. How does his ass taste Kobe?
'We are requesting he turn in his badge because we just watched 'Kazaam'.
I was waiting for the first Kazaam joke. Atta boy, E.
And Kazaam! It was all over for Shaq the Deputy....
Sorry, that was lame...
That's ok Trailwaze. What Shaq was thinking at that point I don't know. I really hope he didn't need the money.
Have you seen him on Cribs? He doesn't need any more $$$.
He could pay all of America $100 and still have plenty left over.
A little obsessed with Superman he is also.
"A little obsessed with Superman he is also."
When did Trailwaze start speaking like Yoda?
Doing it for the kids perhaps Shaquille is? (as Yoda might say).
Critique my ass taste you must Young Kobe. Badge should I lose regardless.
The Force is strong with you E, my young Padawan.
Johnny-Wan Kenobi
Can you guys use your Yoda power to make the fucking blue bird that keeps flying into one of the windows in my sun room stop? Why this thing is not dead yet is beyond me...