Feeling left out because you're unable to be worthy of Black People Love Us? Never fear, the solution is at hand. Rent-a negro (and I think it's the first time I've ever used THAT word on this blog)is a new service allowing any WASP to get - or give - a black friend to a person in need. Seemingly a big hit with teachers and University professors nationwide.
For those on a tight budget, there's a sliding scale of costs (I wanted to say "Chinese Menu" but it seemed a little racist), including:
• Touch Skin: $125 each touch
•Call him/her "brotha," "bro," "brah," "sista," "girlfriend" or "gurrrl": $150 each time
• "Will You Tell Them I'm Not a Racist?": $1500 per vouch
Seen on the blog of a friend who since pulled it, probably in shame and disgust at tasteless satire. Luckily YBNBY has fewer qualms. Props to Damali Ayo.