The following dialogue represents the entire actual conversation that went on inside my head approximately three weeks ago during a commercial break in the second half of the Sunday Night NFL game telecast on NBC...enjoy.
Burger King commercial...probably the next episode of the hit moms thing. Pretty funny, I should go to their site and see if it's worth...wait. no, not the moms. What is this? They're not serving whoppers. That's pretty good...how'd they shoot this? It's like, hidden camera, or something...documentary style...No, hidden camera. Behind the counter at the convenience store. Bullshit. This isn't hidden camera stuff. It said actual customers. Bullshit. Those aren't real people. They're actors. Like the coming out of theaters stuff. It's the best thing I've seen all year. We're going back in to see it again. All that stuff is fake. It's definitely fake. You're not fooling me again. I used to believe all that theater stuff. How long did they get me? Few years...understandable...they're really good actors...I guess...I'm not a smart person. This stuff is fake. They didn't really piss these people off. They're getting really angry. Would I get that angry? I'd be confused. I wouldn't t be angry. Maybe I'd be angry, He's really angry. They'd all have to sign releases. Did they all sign releases? Would I sign a release. How did Borat get all those people to sign releases? Those three racist kids in the Winnebago. Why the hell did they sign the releases? Did you see me? I was one of the racists in the van. Did he get releases? Did these people sign releases? What's that on his shirt? Atreyu...I know that name...that's from a movie. What movie was that from. Atreyu. It's a guy's name. No, it's a kid's name. It's a guy kid's name. Save me Atreyu. No...Help me atreyu? Who the fuck was Atreyu? A.T.R.E.Y.U...official site. Atreyu, you rock. Atreyu lyrics. Atreyu, Orange County. They're from Orange County. They're a band from Orange County. I dont want a band from Orange County. It wasn't a band. It's a guy from a movie. Every time I look up My Bloody Valentine I get that goddamned band. I don't want the band, I want the horror flick. Atreyu's not a band. Pretty popular band...five pages...man, they've got alot of fans...I should go to iTunes and check out Atreyu. Those housewives are from Orange County. Isn't the Hills set in Orange County. What's up with Orange County? Everyone's getting laid in Orange County. Atreyu's definitley getting laid in Orange County. Wouldn't they have to blur the logo? They didn't blur the logo. Lawsuit. Atreyu can sue Burger King. No, they would;ve thought of that. Wait! It's not a real band! It's part of the commercial. I'm supposed to go to google and look up Atreyu. They made me look up Atreyu. That's amazing. They made me look up Atreyu. Wait...They didn't make up Atreyu. There's ten pages of sites on Atreyu. I'm not smart. They bought off Atreyu. They found Atreyu and paid them off. Ateyu's gettin' a ton of free press. Atreyu's smart. Who the fuck was Atreyu...YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS...The NeverEnding Story. Ateyu was the kid in NeverEnding Story.
And now...Where Are They Now - The Three Kids from NeverEnding Story.
Barret Oliver - Bastion
Bastion, the boy who finds The NeverEnding Story in a bookstore, and saves the princess in the end, was played by Barret Oliver. Barret's credits in addition to NeverEnding Story include Cocoon, D.A.R.Y.L., and Tim Burton's very first flick, FrankenWeenie, which I've never seen but sounds interesting. Barret's film career seems to have ended in the late 80's. Since then, he's been a welder (ok), a Scientologist (figures) and has taught photography and gone to school for photojournalism in LA. He has a few fan sites, including the Barret Oliver Minipage and this Geocities page.
Tami Stronach - The Childlike Empress
Tami Stronach, who played The Childlike Empress, has gone on to be a dancer and choreographer. Seems like she's had a pretty interesting life. Daughter of an famous Iranian archeologist, her family fled the Iranian Revolution and moved to California where she landed the role in NeverEnding Story. Not wanting to see their daughter be another child-actor casualty (smart), they made her quit acting at a young age, but not before she also released a single called Tami Stronach - Fairy Queen (that's prety funny). She went to SUNY Purchase where she studied dance, and has since joined the Neta Dance Company in New York. Here's a link to her dance website, and this is her one-listing IMDB page.
Noah Hathaway - Atreyu
Atreyu, the warrior summoned by the Princess to stop the Nothing (and the reason for this whole thing in the first place) was played by Noah Hathaway. Noah's had quite a few tv roles, including appearances in Mork & Mindy, Laverne & Shirley, Eight is Enough and the recurring role of Boxey in Battlestar Galactica. After his acting life, he's been a lifeguard, dance instructor, motorcycle racer, bartender, martial artist and close-quarter combat trainer (don't think we've had one of those). His IMDB page says he's coming back in 2009 so maybe there's a comeback in the works. As for other sites, you can get to his personal site here (all tatted up) and a recent interview here.
Finally, here's the Wikipedia page for The NeverEnding Story. If you've never seen it, it's a pretty cool flick, especially for kids.
...I'm gonna go get a Whopper.
Limahl - The Neverending Story
Atreyu - Becoming The Bull
Whopper Freakout
