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Pinch Hitting: Justin, from Guardedly Optimistic

i_am_starbucks.jpg

We've done this once before, to rave reviews. Angry About Nothing stepped in last month and earned herself a spot on the YesButNoButYes editorial team. Today's pinch hitter is looking to win friends and influence people to head over to his own site, Guardedly Optimistic. Random fact about Justin: His wife is due with their first child today. Here's a little rant he put together about a recent Starbucks campaign.

You don’t have to work in advertising to spot a vapid, unimaginative campaign, but it does make one all the more glaring. Such is the case with Starbucks’ shameless new "I am Starbucks" PR fluff-piece - a campaign only eclipsed in hackiness and unoriginality by the "How do you [name of product]?" campaign (as evidenced here).

Is Starbucks really fooling anyone? Seriously, what’s the point? As a means of helping them better understand (and market to) their customer, I offer the following:

"I am an unemployed freelance designer. I've checked my email 78 times today. I'm on my third cup of coffee. I am Starbucks."

"I'm homeless. It's warm in here. I am Starbucks."

"I had to go to the bathroom. I am Starbucks."

"I’m reading a well-reviewed contemporary novel, trying to look hip. I’m wearing a beret to hide my bald spot. Hopefully one of these young women will talk to me. I am Starbucks."

"I know I’m supposed to boycott large corporations and all, but regular coffee just isn’t strong enough anymore. I am Starbucks."

"This is what passes for culture in my suburb. I am Starbucks."

For more of Justin, visit his site. And if you ever want to step in, email me.

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1 Comment

I am a prissy co-ed with the parents credit card. I am Starbucks

said John Buchner on May 17, 2007 9:58 AM.
The
greatest
pop culture
blog on the
planet.
 
Or
maybe not.


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