Have I read Lord of the Rings? No. Do I have a copy of the novel that sits on my book shelf so all my smart friends think I'm well read? Yes. In truth, I attempted to read it, but it made about as much sense as an REM song. Obviously, Tolkien didn't take into account those of us more comfortable reading highly acclaimed and gripping James Patterson novels.
So when it was announced that Tolkien was releasing a new novel, 34 years after his death, I took notice if for no other reason than Peter Jackson might release it as a kick-ass movie down the road. No one has produced this much posthumous work since Tupac Shakur. Tolkien has "busted out" such gems as, The Silmarillion, Unfinished Tales, and The History of Middle-Earth, all while being supposedly six feet under.
I know what you're thinking; Tolkien was killed by C.S. Lewis in a literary turf war. I thought that might be the case too. It turns out Lewis was dead in 1963, almost 10 years before Tolkien kicked it. However, an eight year-old Suge Knight was out walking the streets.
Am I implying that Suge Knight killed J.R.R. Tolkien in order to take his unreleased material, produce it under the pseudonym "Christopher Tolkien" and reap the benefits of the high-selling novels? No, but I'm not saying it's out of the realm of possibility.
The Children of Hurin was released yesterday to mixed reviews. The plot involves good people who fight bad people and I don't think Liv Tyler is in it. Will I read the novel? No. Will I see it when the Peter Jackson version comes out? Hell yeah, I'll be the first one in line.
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