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Sex Station 7

200703070917
Forget those lame Hot Coffee mods for Grand Theft Auto. say goodbye to the virtual strippers from Second Life. There's a new game in town. Sex Station 7 is described as a first-person sex shooter, which I think is a pretty apt description of most of the guys who'll be playing this - first-person sex shooters.

You play as Dylan Owens, whose mission is to save the "alpha female engineering cyberwhores" of Sex Station 7. No word on whether they wear adult diapers to prevent emergency stoppage on long drives.

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3 Comments

Talk about a confluence of desire! Sex, violence, and video games. We may as well all quit and go home now.

said Miss Cellania on March 7, 2007 10:51 AM.

There better be multiplayer deathmatch modes.

Anyone know what engine this game is on?

said Awol on March 7, 2007 3:34 PM.

Don't bother with this game folks, it has niether any redeeming qualities as a shooter or as titillation content. I'm a seasoned player and collector of shooter games (not to mention I like naked ladies) and was curious enough to try it out.

As a shooter, the gameplay is about as buggy as it comes, I've seen better amateur mods on the net by 13 year olds. The AI consists of run/shoot at you, that is, if the enemy characters don't get hung on a corner or simply just walk in place and not return fire. Maps in the game are nothing but corridors and stairs, with little imagination and no pickups other than the occasional enemy weapon or ammo. The only other things you can pick up are boxes, yes, the boxes. There are a couple of box-stacking points in the game to get up to somewhere else. That's about it. Actually, everything lacks in shooter features. Games from almost ten years ago do better.

The game touts interactive sex with the ladies the hero is to rescue, but the most I've seen in any of the first three episodes is a short CGI nudie dance clip, which stutters horribly. Basically, the girls are polygonal mannequins with, due to the low count, corners on their tits! The shame! Graphics quality is little better than ten years ago.

The only excuse for such a poorly done game, is the fact that the three episodes available never top 200MB in size and the game engine appears to run on a remote server with significant lag issues and very slow load times. Definitely not multiplayer material.

I'm sorry I wasted the money for a trial, but at least I get to warn the rest of you. If I was a game reviewer, I would give it 10%, which would be a gift.

said Zaphod on May 7, 2007 2:34 AM.
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