If we're going out, we're going out with a bang, damnit!

First up, The Erotic Adventures of Zorro, a 1972 soft porn comedy written and produced by exploitation legend David F. Friedman. This production is epic in both budget and scope, and you almost think you've wandered into the wrong theater, that is, until Zorro utters his first line of dialog in the trailer:

Next, I am getting laid. Forgive me Padre, but Zorro tells it like it is.

But don't leave just yet! Our second smash feature is exploitation genius Harry Novak's re-imagining of Bill Shakespeare's finest with The Secret Sex Lives of Romeo and Juliet. The brilliance here is watching late-sixties soft core talent relive their high school play, only with boobs.

Check 'em out before the morality police shut us down. It's been a blast, folks!