In the last few years, Hollywood, the last bastion of civility and morality, was practically giving away Oscars like a Pez dispenser at the sight of someone willing to ditch their perfect looks and make yourself into - well, us. (Or at least me.) Now it seems that what's really inside you (forgive the pun) makes all the difference in the race for gold.
 

Last year, it was Charlize Theron in “Monster,” where she stretched her acting abilites by eating normally and regularly and then pulling off all of her dental caps, all to make herself look like your local CVS cashier. This year’s nominations were kind to the nicely ugly Felicity Huffman in “Transamerica,” but there’s a new way to snatch the Oscar from Tom Hanks for once in the 1,000 or so times he was nominated in the past.

That’s right folks, being gay is the new ugly. Based on the Academy's 8 nods for “Brokeback Mountain”  and Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s nom for the openly gay Truman Capote, it seems that fucking someone in the ass is the new way to get Hollywood liberal types to call you “brave.” It’s too soon to tell if we might see films in the future such as “The Catholic Priest Love Trilogy” or “John Wayne Gacy: Everything You've Seen Is True” for major kudos this time anytime soon, but you know what? In that running open genital sore of a town?

You never know.