Commuting Suicide
Killing myself slowly, day after day
Volume V: "Honk if you're miserable"
This morning our bus had a minor but ear-piercing malfunction. The horn was stuck in the honk position. For twenty-five minutes.
"I don't think he hears it," a fellow passenger hypothesized approximately four minutes in. "Excuse me, sir. Is the horn stuck?"
"Of course it's stuck," he snapped, immediately assigning schmuck status. "Do you really think I'd lean on the horn?"
I really did think he would lean on the horn, and was entirely convinced until his sarcastic reply. I, too, felt like a schmuck.
Then I had a flashback to The Michael Richards Show, a terrible post-Seinfeld flop I'm sure I never watched. But the scene I remembered from the promos was Richards in a convertible, horn stuck, loudly singing Bachman Turner Overdrive's "Taking Care of Business" to drown out the noise. It wasn't funny then, and it surely wasn't funny this morning.
Not much happened during the horn's twenty-five minute anthem. The furious looks by approaching drivers got old. The mood on the bus went from puzzled to furious to defeated. It was like someone said, "What would make this worse?" then turned up the volume.
But, after we pulled over and the driver performed minor surgery, we had peace and quiet. Always an adventure.
Stumble This
Reddit!
That's hysterical! That happened to me and my brother once, too, but in our car. Unfortunately, it was about 1 in the morning and we had to drive around aimlessly for an hour because we didn't know what to do to turn it off!