Lord of War **1/2 (out of four): If you like Nicholas Cage you'll be mildly amused by Andrew Niccol's dark comedy about a cynical gun runner and the despots who love him.

I’m beginning to get discouraged about Andrew Niccol. The writer-director who burst onto the scene with 1997’s low-budget sci-fi gem “Gattaca” has steadily moved from writing high-concept conceits (“The Truman Show”) to low-intelligence farce (“S1m0ne”) before landing on “Lord of War”, a dark gun running comedy painfully in search of a statement.

After a bravura opening credit sequence which traces the path of a bullet from manufacture to discharge, Mr. Niccol attempts to do for the illegal arms traders what “Goodfellas” did for the Mob. But use Mr. Niccol has set the tone of the film he has no where to go.

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My second post for the Lost fans out there...you know one of the funniest characters on the show is the redneck conman Sawyer, who for some reason, won't call anyone by their real name. I was thinking about this last night, and remembering some classics, like Allah McBeal for Sayeed, and Stay Puft for Hurley. And I wondered if anyone has taken the time to write down every single nickname, and post them to the web. Oh, just about a hundred, that's all.

Here's a short list...

Benefits of having your own show...

1) You can humiliate anyone you like, simply for following rules.

On Howard this morning, they played tape of Oprah teaching the CEO of Hermes a lesson in front of a live audience. Now, I could care less about the CEO of Hermes, but Oprah saying race had something to do with a closed store not letting her in, and also saying she wasn't trying to play the celebrity game, is pretty funny. Tell me again, why is it that millions of women listen to this chick?

You can read about it in today's NY Post. (registration required)

Isn't this like, illegal or something?

But, I gotta say, it is cathartic.

Today, we start and finish with Karim Rashid, in honor of his new store on 19th street.

5) I've used the same pen for three years. Meanwhile, I lose a pair of sunglasses per month.
4) If you have to use a gun, remember to wash behind your ears with it.
3) We are what we own...Portraits. Pretty cool.
2) Ain't he the cutest little USB drive you ever did see?
1) And I saw these vases in the front window, and literally stopped in my tracks.

Don't stop now, check out the Top Five archive here.