In 1975 - or so the story goes - one of the strangest events in rock history occurred. On a dark and stormy night the members of AC/DC were travelling from Albany on their way to Philly as part of their Highway to Hell tour. Lost and off track on the backroads of the Ramapo mountains, the tour bus broke down, and the group were attacked by an inbred posse of country folk known as the Jackson-Whites. Legend has it the band were taken to a local outhouse and gangraped repeatedly throughout the night before being set free.

That gruesome event proved not only to be the basis for the legend behind Freddie Krueger and A Nightmare on Elm Street, but - 25 years later - the bastard offspring of that coupling from hell is travelling Europe, playing bluegrass Green Day covers on TV and calling themselves Hayseed Dixie.

The Constant Gardener ***1/2 (out of four) Despite a slow opening, the dynamic direction by Fernando Meirelles and pitch-perfect performance by Ralph Fiennes make this John Le Carré adaptation a gripping, effective film.

Even in his best performances - and there are several: “Schindler’s List”, “Quiz Show” and “The English Patient” come to mind - Ralph Fiennes always seems a bit standoffish. Maybe it’s the oh-so-British accent or the severe European profile, but something about Mr. Fiennes tends to come off cold. Of course, for roles like the Commandant in “Schindler” that quality worked to his advantage. Mr. Fiennes has always been better at playing brains rather than heart.

However, from the opening moments of “The Constant Gardener”, Fernando Meirelles’ gripping adaptation of the John Le Carré novel, Mr. Fiennes dispels any doubt about his abilities in this arena. Playing Justin Quayle, a gardener stationed in Kenya whose wife Tessa (Rachel Weisz), an outspoken activist, is killed, Mr. Fiennes, drawing his lips inward and adding just a slight quaver to his voice, gives his finest performance in almost a decade.

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In all the postings about the tragedy in Louisiana, I'm surprised you guys didn't pick up on what must have been the strangest pop culture moment of the year: The venerable New York Times deciding that it would be a good idea to get comment on Hurricane Katrina from Katrina & The Waves, the 80s band behind Walking on Sunshine.

Next up - Diana Ross & The Supremes share their views on the death of Rehnquist

- Does everybody love the Labor Day Telethon?
- What was the Jerry and Dean break-up all about?
- Did Jerry make a movie about the Holocaust that was never released?
- Why did Jerry have that moon face a couple years ago?
- What's with the French? Why do they love him?

Would it be wrong to rent a wookie costume and a yarmulka and go to a Halloween party dressed as Jewbacca?

How 'bout a brown cape, light saber and pizza apron, and go as ObiWop Kenobi?

...like the man said, our usual drivel.

In my formative years, I remember being decidedly spooked by a black & white British movie, Village of the Damned. Remade some years ago featuring Christopher Reeve in his last role before his accident, the story is of a remote village where overnight, all the women become mysteriously pregnant. I don't think it was ever stated exactly how that happened - some kind of alien intervention I guess, but nine months later, a crop of blonde haired, blue-eyed psychopath mutants were born. Very spooky stuff.

All of which means I'm not going to be traveling to Canton, Ohio in the next 12 months, where, according to a news report, the local high school currently has 64 pregnant students. Sprogs from outer space.

Well, either that, or there's not much for kids to do in the evenings around there.

DO THIS NOW: People Finder Volunteer
it's a way computer geeks (or even the not so geeky) can help.

computers for the astrodome

we're sending clothes to the Malcolm X Grassroots Effort, although everyone agrees that the best way to help is by donating money.

As recovery and relief efforts begin to assist victims, well-meaning volunteers are being urged not to report directly to the affected areas unless directed by a volunteer agency. Please be patient and allow the professional first-responders and aid workers to do their job. Visit the USA Freedom Corps Volunteer Network in the coming weeks, months and years to find opportunities to engage in ongoing relief efforts and prepare for future disasters.

no kidding. "volunteer physicians are pouring in to care for the sick, but red tape is keeping hundreds of others from caring for Hurricane Katrina survivors while health problems escalate." (msnbc)

volunteer: healthcare professionals, police, fire corps, citizen corps,
red cross and here's a list of some local organizations where people can volunteer

and if you're in orlando, the temple shir shalom of oviedo is looking for volunteers to coordinate food donations onto 5 18-wheelers.

Who blows the bugle at the Kentucky Derby? Who dusts the dinosaur bones at the Smithsonian? Who sniffs dog breath for a living? Who measures the breasts of real models? Who cares? Nancy Rica Schiff does, that's who! And she shares her 12-year obsession with us through 65 intimate portraits.

Man, I go away for a week, and this site turns into a platform for serious debate about current affairs. Will you guys please cut it out and return to our usual drivel?

yes, Scaramouch is back to lower the tone. I've got a ton of stuff to slowly catch up on, but here's the first that caught my eye: A “Russian Brides” Konfabulator Widget. Get the latest Slavic Totties delivered direct to your desktop.

and don't forget, you can save 15% every time you send a flower arrangement to a fellow union member.

Happy Labor Day America!

Did you know that the first Labor Day holiday was celebrated on Tuesday, September 5, 1882, in New York City, in accordance with the plans of the Central Labor Union? (US DOL)

Did you know that in European countries, China and other parts of the world, May Day, the first day in May, is a holiday to celebrate workers and labor unions? Before it became an international workers holiday, May Day was a celebration of spring and the promise of summer. (howstuffworks)

Did you know that on January 13, 1874, as unemployed workers demonstrated in New York's Tompkins Square Park, a detachment of mounted police charged into the crowd, beating men, women and children indiscriminately with billy clubs and leaving hundreds of casualties in their wake? (an eclectic list of events in us labor history)

Did you know that on March 25, 1911, 148 sweatshop workers in the Triangle Shirtwaist Company (mostly women and young girls) were killed in a fire because the exits were locked to prevent breaks and theft? (trianglefactoryfire)

Did you know that on May 19, 1920, 10 were killed in the "Matewan massacre," an integral part of the fight for industrial democracy and workers' rights that was sweeping the country? (matewan)

Did you know that that over one million people in the US have worked as prostitutes in the United States? (pen)

Did you know that there are currently approximately a million people in the US working in the legal profession? (bls)

The Transporter 2 *1/2 (out of four) As an action movie, tireless producer Luc Besson's high-octane low-plausibility sequel makes a great car commercial.

With “The Transporter 2,” producer Luc Besson means to beat critics at their own game. How can you criticize the silliness of a movie that embraces its own implausibility? When Frank Martin, the somber-to-the-point-of-drowsiness superdriver played here as in the 2002 original with an all-the-way-to-the-bank smirk by Jason Statham, sees the reflection of a bomb beneath his seemingly indestructible Audi he doesn’t get out of the car and remove it. Instead he performs a corkscrew jump which would make “The Dukes of Hazzard” proud, dislodging the bomb on an opportunely-positioned hook. Ridiculous? Absolutely. Forgiven due to the quality of the rest of the film? Not quite.

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- Jefferson Parish President Aaron Broussard broke down in tears while telling the story of a friend's mother who drowned. (HuffPost thinks it was handled poorly.)

- A coastal reclamation project called Coast 2050 was discussed.

- And a nearly frothing at the mouth Tim Russert asked Secretary of Homeland Security Chertoff if he was going to resign. (Tim's obviously been watching other reporters all week and decided he had to step up to the plate.)

For 11 years, Brown was commissioner of judges and stewards for the International Arabian Horse Association...and he was asked to RESIGN...what the fuck?

Here's a site that has pretty strong feelings on the issue