One of the "addictions" that was attributed to the late Michael Jackson was shopping. In the famous Martin Bashir interview he is shown going through a shop in Vegas spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on kitschy junk. We have all heard the figure of $400 million in the hole being thrown about.

However, Jacko couldn't buy Joseph (John) Merrick's skeleton.

The reports were admittedly dubious. But there are accounts in the late 80's that say the MJ attempted to buy the Elephant Man's bones from the Royal London Hospital. To no avail. One report said:

Michael Jackson has submitted an official bid, for an undisclosed sum, for the remains of the late John Merrick, known as the Elephant Man, from the London Hospital Medical College which has kept them since Merrick's death in 1890.

I don't know if the story is true. Though I think it is. Let's just be glad the Merrick's remains are safe in the London Hospital Museum and not about to be auctioned off to pay outstanding lawyer's fees. That would be a real bummer. Joseph Merrick was an amazing man. The film made about his life honestly makes me cry. When you look at these photos, as I have done many times, one wonders if they could handle Merrick's mistreatment and mockery. He was the definition of bravery.

It's my hope that Merrick's ghost is trying to buy Michael Jackson's bones.

Here's a bloodier Japanese version of the fantasy played out in the Light Saber Catfight post below. Apparently, this is a real movie.

(via Geeks Are Sexy)

Thomas Jefferson intended for the Declaration of Independence to be performed, not just read.
He believed the public reading and performance of this manifesto would be the ultimate act of defiance.

A few years ago his wish came true with this 14 minute video. The reading begins at about 4:45.

Take it away Morgan Freeman and fellow famous folks...

Happy 4th to you and yours.

Link

Saber
Your fantasies have been pegged and brought to life. Be sure to stay for the punchline.

(via Gorilla Mask)

The other night Baierman and I had dinner. A romantic night at a cozy hole-in-the-wall bistro called Quizno's. If you're ever in Manhattan and near 5th Avenue, I highly recommend the joint. Try the Steakhouse Beef Dip. A delight for the taste buds. It's a party in your mouth ... and everyone's invited.

Anyhoo, we conversed about all manner of topics. Jimmy Page, Elvis Presley, the unintentional comedy in Rattle and Hum, my beliefs concerning the Loch Ness Monster and Bigfoot (Seriously, we did talk about that), David Letterman and the Ed Sullivan Theater, snake charmers, the history of magic, all kinds of crap. We also talked about our favorite podcasts.

The recommendation I gave to BM I am passing on to you, faithful readers. The Bugle. My favorite podcast. The show feature's the Daily Show's John Oliver and fellow Brit Andy Zaltzman. It is a satirical current events podcast with some of the funniest analysis you'll hear on the interwebs.

Give it a listen. It's smart and entertaining.

Sure, everyone knows the new junior senator from Minnesota used to be on SNL (including the roughly 4.5 trillion people yesterday who Tweeted a "good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like him" joke after the news broke.)

But did you know that in the early '80s Al Franken also co-founded the Franken & Davis School of Rock Star Impersonators?

(I originally wanted to do a retrospective of some of my favorite Franken & Davis sketches from back in the day, but my searches for embeddable SNL videos came up short...this was a pretty fantastic consolation prize, though, one I couldn't believe I'd missed until now.)

From the crank file...

Some guys really know how to fly.
And some guys really know how to fly and get arrested.

A US Airways passenger who stripped naked on a flight from Charlotte to Los Angeles Tuesday...was restrained and covered by two off-duty law enforcement officers.

This 50-year-old mile-high exhibitionist was taken into custody by airport police, who called the FBI.

And quite possibly Michele Obama.
(That dude looks like our President!)

The flight was diverted so this nude flier could be removed from the plane.

I imagine this must have made for an interesting flight in first class. Especially for that poor lady sitting next to him.

"Honey how was your flight?"...."Flabby. And shriveled."

Oh, and this being the age of the camera phone, there's a few more photos too!

Robert Hazard wrote it.

Cindy Lauper made it famous.

And since 1983 many artists have remade and reinterpreted the a worldwide smash hit "Girls Just Want to Have Fun."

Results, as with most remakes, will vary.

PS - Long live Captain Lou Albano!

For our tenth episode, we invite Baierman to the dais to discuss recent celebrity deaths and enlighten us as to how Farrah Fawcett really died.

We've had our little disagreements over handguns on this site in the past.

But I'm in line with the opinions expressed in this billboard.
Damn kids...

Via Outdoor Database